Post by Silvio Megala on Sept 20, 2012 18:25:57 GMT -4
AWR CRASH TV #15
LIVE!
David Saturn-"Welcome to CRASH Tv where once again we are LIVE! I'm David Saturn along with my esteemed "colleague" Neal Steal..."
Neal Steal-"If you were expecting to be treated to an Anthony Royal match I'm afraid he will not be wrestling here tonight."
David Saturn-"Well we have 4 tremendous matches including another violent showdown between Tracy Adkins and Hell! This match will be a street fight!"
Neal Steal-"Well I'm just glad they won't be anywhere around us..."
David Saturn-"Fa Sho will be in action for the first time since being screwed at the PPV. He takes on the man who has been screwed more times than anyone...but only in his own mind...Robert Carr!"
Neal Steal-"Hopefully Robert will finally get the break he deserves but judging by the way this place is being run at the moment...what's this! Oh no he isn't scheduled out here!"
Slick's music hits as he appears at the top of the ramp with microphone in hand, and Steal tries to slither out of his seat.
Slick:"Whoa, whoa. whoa Neal. Stay right there. I'm not gonna hurt you. I actually have a little surprise for you."
Slick motions backstage...
Slick: I present to you, and all the fans in the stands, Mrs. Beverly Steal!!!!
A well dressed, old, but very well preserved woman comes out from the back. Steal's jaw drops to the floor.
David Saturn-"What the hell!"
Mrs Steal:"Hello there my little butterball! Long time no see! What is it 4 or 5 years? Looks like you have gained quite the reputation around here son..."
Steal still looks frozen with shock...clearly this is his actual real mother.
David Saturn-"Steal looks like he's seen a ghost!"
Mrs Steal-"Yes Neal you always had a bit of a reputation didn't you? What was it they called you when you were suspended from school all those years ago? Ah yes a disgusting little pervert wasn't it? I was so humiliated! I never brought up my son to go peeking into girls bathrooms!"
Neal Steal-"I was set up by those boys when that happened!"
David Saturn-"This is maybe the best thing I've ever seen..."
Steal looks like he's about to cry...
Mrs Steal-"Remember when you stole that money from us and spent it on that stash of viagra? I don't even know what that is but you were taking it every night! You certainly live up to the family name that's for sure...just in all the wrong ways!"
Steal is now sobbing at the announce table as Saturn loudly laughs...
Mrs Steal-"Oh look Neal's turning on the waterworks? Maybe that's why his bed was wet so often when he woke up in the morning...had to buy new sheets every 2 weeks..."
Neal Steal-"That's not true! You don't know what you're saying!"
David Saturn-"Looks like she knows exactly what she's saying!"
Mrs Steal-"One time he tried to pay his own sister to take him to the prom...even she refused!"
David Saturn-"That's pathetic even by your standards!"
Mrs Steal-"You know Neal when you got yourself on Tv we wondered who you must have blackmailed. Still we tried very hard to be proud at first but you know what? I would be prouder to have a son like Slick than someone like you! At least he lives his life to the full and know how to have a good time!"
David Saturn-"Ha ha ha ha ha!"
Tears are rolling down Steal's cheeks...he has probably never been so humiliated...
Mrs Steal-"I was surprised to get a call from Slick last week after you pulled your latest disgusting stunt. We disowned you years ago but what you did last week was low even for you! I actually do have a terminal illness for the record..."
Neal Steal-"What?"
David Saturn-"You really are a jackass aren't you? How could you do that to your own mother?"
Mrs Steal-"Had no idea did you? 6 months from now I'll probably be 6 feet under...and you know what? You're banned from the funeral!"
Neal Steal-"No!"
Mrs Steal-"You won't be getting anything from the will either so don't get your hopes up there sonny!"
David Saturn-"This is priceless...surprised your Mother actually looks like a normal person Steal..."
Mrs Steal-"So now the whole world knows Neal...even your own Mother hates your guts!"
Steal sobs loudly into the mic as the entire crowd laugh at him.
Mrs Steal-"Oh and Mr Saturn you're welcome at the Steal household for lunch anytime you like!"
David Saturn-"Thanks Mrs Steal!"
Steal lets out an agonised yell...
Mrs Steal-"Oh and one more thing...your father and grandfather will be turning in their graves! I'm actually sorry I even gave birth to you! Should have had that abortion like they suggested..."
Mrs Steal leaves as Saturn and the entire crowd continue to laugh. Steal wipes his eyes and glares over at Saturn...
Neal Steal-"She's terminally ill. That's what she just said so obviously the chemotherapy has had a severe mental effect...my Mother loves me dearly."
David Saturn-"She had a funny way of showing it! How would you know whether she had chemo anyway? You had no idea she was terminally ill! You are a total liar!"
Neal Steal-"How could Slick take advantage of a sick elderly woman like that. She had no idea what she was saying. She was showing signs of dementia last time I saw her..."
David Saturn-"I knew you were hated Steal but my god! Even I didn't think your own mother would hate you!"
Neal Steal-"She does not hate me! This is all Slick's fault! How could he do this to me? Using my sick Mother like this..."
David Saturn-"You got what you deserved! Don't think you will be interfering in Slick's business again...wait here comes Rattlesnake!"
VS
From Sweetwater, Texas...RATTLESNAKE!!!
Neal Steal-"I don't like Rattlesnake much but he would never stoop as low as Slick just did..."
David Saturn-"Well he has something in common with you...selective eyesight. Snake accused RCH of cheating to beat him last week...no idea what he is referring to it looked like a clean pin to me..."
Neal Steal-"Well RCH tried to use the tights at one stage..."
David Saturn-"Well if that's all it is Snake does not have a very strong case I'm afraid...here comes Gunner!"
From Portland, Oregon...Gunner...HUGHES!!![/center]
Neal Steal-"I'm not sure why Gunner decided to team with Rattlesnake tonight. He's clearly everything Rattlesnake isn't intelligent and cool under pressure..."
David Saturn-"Maybe Rattlesnake will learn from it he does have a tendency to get hot headed...well Combs isn't wasting any time..."
From Los Angeles, California...Killa...Jay...COMBS!!!
David Saturn-"We didn't hear much from Combs this past week but I'm guessing that hand is in exceptionally bad condition..."
Neal Steal-"Obviously after what Gunner did last week...what a brawl that was it took several minutes to separate them after the show ended..."
David Saturn-"...and what a tremendous reaction for the hatchet warrior...RCH3!"
From the Dark Forest....RCH...3333333333!!!
Gunner and Rattlesnake are talking on the outside as RCH waves his hatchet around. Combs seems a little unfocused perhaps concerned about his injured hand. Combs seems to be wearing a protected glove but that won't be of much use against the likes of Gunner and Snake. It looks like Snake is going over strategy...
David Saturn-"I'm not sure Snake has much of a strategy other than to beat the hell out of his opponent..."
Neal Steal-"That's what Gunner prefers as well but we saw another side of Gunner last week..."
David Saturn-"Well he used more sophisticated offence than Snake usually does..."
Neal Steal-"Snake is just like Slick...an ugly unkempt brawler..."
David Saturn-"Don't think your Mother has left yet Steal...maybe sharing a few cold ones with Slick backstage..."
Neal Steal-"I'm struggling to concentrate on this match after that horrible news I had earlier about my mothers terminal illness..."
David Saturn-"Oh shut up! You made it up last week why would you care now?"
Neal Steal-"At least my Mother is still alive...heard yours died years ago..."
Snake has been known to order around tag partners in the past. It wasn't wise saying he had ordered Hell to do things in the past and he better be careful not to repeat the same mistake. Still Rattlesnake is not exactly known for his diplomacy. Both men suddenly charge under the bottom and RCH and Combs meet them with kicks and stomps...
David Saturn-"My mother is alive and well and frankly that's none of your damn business..."
Neal Steal-"Oh but its alright for your drunken oaf buddy to exploit my mothers illness..."
David Saturn-"Its ok for her to show up and verbally tear you a new asshole yes! After what you did last week..."
Gunner fights to his feet but RCH clotheslines him over the top rope! Rattlesnake is also thrown to the outside. A flurry of fists are exchanged and RCH is rammed head first into the announce table by Gunner. Combs goes to ram Rattlesnake into the ringpost but Combs managed to block. Elbow to the ribs of Snake by Combs who then rolls Snake back into the ring...
David Saturn-"Certainly not a very scientific matchup so far. The first tag match we have had since the company reopened..."
Neal Steal-"I just hope it does not go out of control. I haven't seen Maggia anywhere tonight he should be making his presence felt and restoring some order around here..."
David Saturn-"You want him to blatantly favour Anthony Royal in other words...still not sure what's going on Silvio Megala still hasn't been heard from in weeks..."
The referee manages to restore some order on the outside as Combs and Snake exchange punches. Snake suddenly bites Combs across the hand (the referee failing to notice somehow) and Snake then delivers several knees to the ribs. Gunner and RCH are in their respective corners now and Combs is whipped towards Gunner.
Neal Steal-"Nice teamwork! Snake you better keep listening to Gunner...last thing we need is Snake thinking for himself..."
David Saturn-"You don't have to be Einstein to physically compete in the AWR! Snake still calling out Jason Howard for some reason that was the match he really wanted here tonight..."
Neal Steal-"We will see Jason in action later tonight against Dustin Weaver of course..."
Gunner nails Combs with a shot to the back of the head then Snake charges forward with a running knee to the face. Snake tags in Gunner who clubs Combs hard across the head. Gunner grabs Combs by the injured hand and whips him off the ropes. Armdrag takedown by Gunner as Combs rebounds back at him.
Neal Steal-"Bet you're surprised by that aren't you Saturn. You thought Gunner was just a smashmouth brawler that was a expertly executed takedown..."
David Saturn-"Ah yes pure sweet science there. Not like its one of the first things they teach in wrestling school...and I never said that about Hughes at all. You're a liar and your momma said so!"
Neal Steal-"Stop mentioning my Mother or I'll..."
David Saturn-"Well I would like to see you try! Remember you hit me and it will be YOU who's fired! I'm not going to hit you by the way no matter how hard you try tonight I managed for 12 years until that recent incident..."
Combs quickly gets to his feet clearly realising Gunner is targeting the hand. Combs blocks a right hand then gives Gunner a stiff shot with his good hand. Gunner is rammed head first into the corner turnbuckle and RCH is brought into the action with a tag. RCH drives his head into Gunner's ribs and then delivers a swinging neck breaker!
Neal Steal-"Gunner up very fast! Gunner is a very serious competitor and clearly dislikes RCH..."
David Saturn-"RCH is a serious competitor as well. You can't be a world champion without being a serious competitor..."
Neal Steal-"He isn't the world champion Mr Royal is..."
David Saturn-"Obviously I'm referring to his title victories in previous federations...he hasn't had time to win a world title here yet!"
Neal Steal-"He won't either while Mr Royal is around..."
Cover by RCH...1 and Gunner is already up. Gunner quickly whips RCH into the corner and tags in Rattlesnake. Quick headlock takedown and armbar applied by RCH and he takes Snake into the corner tagging in Combs. Kick to the ribs by Killa but Snake fires back with right hand. Combs retaliates with a chop and a thrust to the neck...
David Saturn-"Combs certainly doing a good job of protecting that hand...better than last week..."
Neal Steal-"Well Snake better tag Gunner in he will tear at it without mercy. I don't know why Combs is teaming with RCH he's made mistakes associating with the wrong people in the past."
Punches to the face by Combs and then he rams Snake head first into the corner turnbuckle. Combs tags in RCH who delivers a hard knee to the face. Cover by RCH...1,2...and Snake kicks out. RCH then tags in Combs again (rapid tags here) who immediately pounds on Snake. The referee somehow fails to notice a blatant low blow there by Snake...
David Saturn-"No doubt you would be moaning about that if Gunner wasn't the partner of Snake here tonight...."
Neal Steal-"Snake should be careful Gunner will not be pleased if Snake stupidly gets disqualified. What is Snake doing here..."
David Saturn-"Snake is no aerial specialist. That's not Snake's strength...there's more chance of you coming up with some decent WRESTLING analysis..."
Neal Steal-"You're the hold for hold guy..."
David Saturn-"I don't need to call every hold as it happens. Some might use that style but people can see things for themselves too..."
Snake then tosses Combs to the outside through the middle rope. Snake climbs onto the middle rope and leaps off completely missing Combs with a double axe handle. Rattlesnake is not known for his aerial prowess and that's why. RCH goes over to assist Combs but is immediately met by Gunner. Another flurry of punches follow...
David Saturn-"Well Snake did notice the referee counting there..."
Neal Steal-"He knows how to count to 10?"
David Saturn-"Of course he does!"
Neal Steal-"I think Gunner must have warned him..."
Snake gets back into the ring noticing the ref has started to count. Combs delivers a big right hand to Gunner. Meanwhile RCH picks up his hatchet and Snake turns towards him and starts cursing...the distraction works as Combs takes out Snake's leg from the outside. Combs wraps Snake's leg around the ringpost as Gunner and RCH quickly follow...
Neal Steal-"Get up Snake...you don't see Gunner lying on his back!"
David Saturn-"His leg has anyone else can is being wrapped around the ringpost!"
Neal Steal-"Well unwrap it then!"
Gunner nails Combs with a right hand as RCH continues working on Snake's leg. RCH rams Snake's knee hard into the ringpost. Combs and Gunner are forced to break up by the ref and Combs being the legal man gets back into the ring. Hard clothesline by Combs knocks Snake right to the mat...Snake was distracted easily again by RCH...
Neal Steal-"Snake distracted easily again...still hard not to be by this clown..."
David Saturn-"He is NOT a clown! That is the reaction of simplistic fools like yourself. Cheap shot there by Combs...I do wonder what will happen if Hughes ever snaps..."
Neal Steal-"Foolish by Combs...already RCH is being a bad influence..."
David Saturn-"I never heard RCH tell him to do that...Combs is more than capable of making decisions for himself..."
Combs delivers a cheap shot to Gunner on the apron. That does not provoke Gunner at all as he fixes Combs with an icy glare. Combs tags in RCH who drops his knee across Snake's throat. RCH and Combs have certainly been aggressive here and their teamwork has probably been more evident.
Neal Steal-"See how generous Gunner is. He was very kind helping out someone like Snake who will not be grateful for the assistance..."
David Saturn-"Well he won't get much gratitude from Snake that's for sure..."
RCH then tries to wrap his legs around Snake's leg. Snake does not like mat wrestling and quickly falls forward driving his head into the ribs of RCH. Well actually that may have been a little low...1,2..reversal...1,2...and Snake is quick to kick out. Snake was very nearly caught out by that reversal there.
Neal Steal-"Ha ha ha! Gunner must have taught him that!"
David Saturn-"Snake is very predictable but now and again he manges to do something just a little bit surprising..."
Neal Steal-"It used to be a surprise when he actually won a match...his record isn't so bad here in AWR..."
David Saturn-"RCH certainly knows how to expect the unexpected...hardly conventional himself in the ring..."
Surprisingly Snake executes a clever rollup himself...1,2...and RCH kicks out. Snake begins pounding on RCH clearly getting frustrated. Snake is easily angered and still seems very wary of RCH. Snake has a headlock on RCH and then he grabs hold of the ropes. A bit hypocritical of Snake to accuse RCH of cheating last week he has bent the rules a bit in this match...
David Saturn-"Gunner of course completely dismissive of RCH...maybe he is beginning to gain some respect for RCH as a wrestler here..."
Neal Steal-"Gunner clearly admitted RCH is a good wrestler...he just despises that silly makeup as much as I do...no doubt the merchandise staff are selling toy hatchets these fans will buy any cheap tat..."
David Saturn-"They could steal from their family and buy viagra instead..."
Neal Steal-"Shut up Saturn."
RCH manages to roll to the outside and he rams Snake into the announce table. Gunner suddenly charges down from the apron nailing RCH with two clubbing blows to the back. Combs is quick to assist and pounds on Gunner who manages to stay on his feet. Meanwhile behind the referees back Snake nails RCH with a chair!
Neal Steal-"Yahoo! Gunner didn't tell him to do that of course he wouldn't need a weapon but hopefully that's knocked out the clown!"
David Saturn-"Blatant cheating but at least Rattlesnake is honest about it...unlike some people...cough Royal...cough..."
Combs is in the ring and executes a brainbuster on Rattlesnake! Combs isn't the legal man but the ref has lost track of the action here. Combs with the cover...1,2...but Snake gets his foot across the ropes. Gunner tags himself in reaching through the ropes (Combs does not notice but the ref does) and charges off the ropes.
Neal Steal-"Yahoo! That's even worse than being smashed with a chair!"
David Saturn-"Just so much FEROCITY behind that kick!"
Combs spins round and Hughes nails him right in the face with the BUCKSHOT! Gunner makes the cover...1,2...3!!! RCH is getting up on the outside and he picks up the hatchet! RCH charges into the ring and Rattlesnake and Gunner quickly retreat. Neither man backs down generally but anyone would leave the ring when they are being charged at by a hatchet wielding maniac.
Neal Steal-"Sore loser!"
David Saturn-"Well he did get smashed by a chair..."
Neal Steal-"Which wasn't Gunner's fault..."
David Saturn-"I never said it was!"
WINNERS BY PINFALL: GUNNER HUGHES & RATTLESNAKE
Rattlesnake throws a table into the ring but Gunner has a quiet word in his ear. Snake surprisingly listens and both men retreat back up the ramp. For a moment Gunner walks behind Snake and looks like he is contemplating kicking Snake in the head. The fans clearly aren't sure what to expect from Hughes and Snake quickly looks back seeming a little wary as well...
Neal Steal-"Ha ha I was hoping Gunner was going to kick him there..."
David Saturn-"Snake getting his usual mix of boos and cheers...it would have been most unfair of Gunner had he kicked him. Looked like he was considering it..."
Neal Steal-"Oh look at that! RCH would be strongly fined for that until competent administration. Are you going to let that go unpunished as well Maggia?"
David Saturn-"I don't endorse what RCH just did there but he certainly has a right to be frustrated..."
RCH and Combs meanwhile are arguing with the referee in the ring...the ref goes to leave but RCH plants him into the mat with the WICKED WILD!!! RCH and Combs certainly do have a grievance with the referee failing to notice Snake's blatant chair shot. Both men make their way up the ramp...
Neal Steal-"Just a very sore loser! Gunner Hughes deserved to win that match and RCH shouldn't take it out on the referee..."
David Saturn-"I believe it was a tag team match or have you already forgotten that? Rattlesnake carried his share of the burden..."
Neal Steal-"Well it was Gunner who got the pin that's what the record books will say..."
David Saturn-"It will say that Gunner Hughes AND Rattlesnake won...wait something going on in the back?
We fade to the back where we see Sergio Esposito. He at the catering table looking over the food options. Suddenly, from seemingly out of nowhere, he is blasted in the back of the head with a led pipe. The camera pans to see an enraged Royal standing over Sergio with the pipe in his hand. He picks Sergio up by the hair and once again smashes him with the pipe, this time in the face. Royal then mounts Sergio and begins reigning down right hands on him. Sergio is busted open badly as Royal has a crazed look in his eyes. Royal picks Sergio up one more time, places the pipe under his chin, and begins choking whatever life he had left in him out of him. Finally, Royal tosses Sergio forcefully. The back of Sergio’s head cracks off the wall with a sickening thud. Royal looks down on his victim and walks away with a faraway look on his face.
**************************************************************************************************************************
MOMENTS AGO:
We see a repeat of Royal's shocking attack on Sergio Esposito. The scene then cuts back to the announcers with Saturn looking absolutely disgusted. Steal himself looks rather surprised...
David Saturn-"What the hell was that all about? He just attacked the guy for no reason!"
Neal Steal-"Well maybe it was like last week with Fa Sho. Maybe Sergio said something slanderous about Mr Royal he did seem a little but cocky...
David Saturn-"Whatever it was Royal just absolutely snapped. There must be a reason...even people like Royal don't just explode with rage like that for no reason...then again this is the guy who assaulted several superstars last year without provocation..."
Neal Steal-"Not a great couple of weeks for Esposito. First his manager was injured and now this...I would be surprised if he returned..."
David Saturn-"No thanks to your hero. Anyway I believe we are going to have a guest announcer for the upcoming street fight....
Neal Steal-"What I never gave permission for that!"
David Saturn-He didn't ask for your permission! I'm going to just sit back and enjoy this...
Neal Steal-"I'm not announcing either if its who I think it is...especially after what he did to me earlier tonight!"
We see Tracy Adkins in the parking lot with a lead pipe in hand awaiting the arrival of Hell. Tracy begins talking trash to the cameramen mentioning something about the purity of pain. The cameramen exchange bemused looks in response. Suddenly some fans watching (wisely keeping some distance) cheer as Slick Doctor shows up with a mic!
Slick Doctor-"What's up Tracy old buddy old pal?"
It looks like Slick has taken it upon himself to supply the commentary for this match. Tracy starts cursing at Slick who sarcastically bows to Tracy in response. The crowd cheer again (though not as loudly as Slick's reception) as Hell marches into the parking lot. Hell looks over at Slick not appearing surprised by his presence (no doubt knowing Slick wouldn't forget Hell's interference costing him the title) but motions warning him not to get involved.
Slick-"Hey I'm not deaf you big oaf! Where's your cowboy hat this week Trace?"
Slick loudly insults both men as they approach each other. Tracy looks at Hell with a sick smile which just about sums up their twisted relationship. Slick suddenly yells at Hell gesturing towards something but as Hell turns around nothing is there. Tracy charges nailing Hell with his lead pipe in the ribs. Slick laughs at being able to distract Hell quite so easily...
Slick-"Ha ha ha ha ha! He's certainly not the hottest fire in hell! That's right Tracy go for the kidney...some actual signs of thinking there by Tracy Adkins!"
Slick chugs beer with one hand, mic in the other as he continues to insult both men. Hell grabs his kidney area where he has an history of injuries. Tracy slams Hell face first into a parked automobile. Tracy then turns to Slick mentioning something about his father being an abusive drunk. Right hand by Tracy with some power there actually staggering Hell for a moment...
Slick-"Remember, don't drink and drive! Make sure to always have a designated driver. Preferably a nice broad who brings you back to her pad."
Hell is rammed into another parked car as Slick calls for the viewers never to drink and drive! Clubbing right hands by Tracy but Hell responds with a powerful uppercut. Tracy did well to stay on his feet there. Slick meanwhile is lying outstretched across a car bonnet casually calling the action. Hell clubs Tracy across the back and then tosses Tracy right onto a car windshield!
Slick-"Geez, this is about as exciting as a Silvio Megala match! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"
Tracy does not smash through but the windshield is clearly cracked. Slick starts snoring agitating Hell who is getting more and more irritated by Slick's presence here. Hell kicks Tracy hard in the ribs twice and then sends him sprawling across a car bonnet. Hell rams Tracy into another car bonnet but then turns towards Slick threatening to attack him if he makes another insulting remark...
Slick-"That'll leave a mark! Whoa whoa whoa Hell keep your eye on the right guy this week! Maybe he'll be blind. At least he won't have to look at himself in the mirror..."
Tracy then picks up a piece of loose metal and hits Hell in the face with it. That sharp point looks like it almost caught Hell in the eye. As the camera zooms in we can see Tracy has indeed drawn blood from just underneath the eye. Tracy then throws Hell hard into a windshield! Tracy then climbs onto the bonnet and stupidly attempts to suplex Hell onto the concrete...
Slick-"Dumbass. What do you expect from a product of an inbred home."
That is hardly likely to work on a 7 footer like Hell. Slick laughs loudly at Adkins for attempting that move. Hell of course blocks and reverses the move vertically suplexing Adkins on the car bonnet! As Tracy contorts clutching his back in pain (maybe he is getting pleasure from it) Hell breaks into a car boot and finds a baseball bat in the trunk...
Slick-(singing) "Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack, I don't care if I never get back!"
Hell gives Slick a smug little grin which for the first time gets a slightly angry reaction out of Slick. Hell approaches Tracy who manages to block as Hell tries to nail him with the baseball bat. Low blow by Tracy which of course won't be a DQ in this match and then Adkins hits Hell right in the kidney with the baseball bat...
Slick-"Owwwwww have mercy!"
Tracy is bleeding from the lower arm and mouth. Hell meanwhile splutters from the bat shot but no sign of internal bleeding. He is still busted open below the eye. Hells suddenly shoves Tracy away with such force he bounces right off the hood of a parked car! Slick winces loud at the impact drawing quite a bit of laughter from the cameramen...
Slick-"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh...remember Silver Stone? I have a fond memory of bashing him over the head with a shovel..."
Hell threatens the cameramen to shut up (or else) which wisely they do. Slick wriggles his fingers feigning cowardice. Hell walks back to the open car boot and pulls out a shovel. Hell walks back towards Tracy and swings the shovel narrowly missing Adkins and hitting a car bonnet instead! Tracy ducks another shot then foolishly tries to start a fistfight with Hell...
Slick-"There's about as much chance of Tracy winning a fistfight with Hell as Skull turning down a free all you can eat buffet!"
Hell again pushes Tracy away and warns Slick to keep his distance again. Slick yawns at being threatened yet again. Hell charges and Adkins looks like he's about to try a back body drop! More more likely he lifts Hell up just enough to drop him face first on the car windshield! Hell's head smashes through the glass prompting laughter from Slick...
Slick-"Oh my god! Hell better have the skills to pay the bills! Hopefully Steal's car is out here somewhere!"
Slick's behaviour here is endearingly obnoxious. Hell manages to get to his feet as Tracy tries to nail him with the shovel! Hell moves which is a good thing as Tracy completely smashed one of the car lights with that swing! Hell punches Tracy in the ribs and rams him head first into another bonnet. Hell is busted open badly and could well have broken glass stuck in his skin...
Slick-"This isn't clean cut family entertainment! Welcome to Baddlands!
Slick amusingly makes comments about this being unfit for family viewing. Hell walks towards Tracy who pulls open a car door ramming it into Hell. Tracy tries to shut Hell's head in the car door choking him instead as Hell tries to fight back. Tracy pulls out the seatbelt and wraps it around Hell's neck. Tracy shuts the car door with the seatbelt stuck in the door gap and around Hell's neck...
Slick-"Remember always wear a seatbelt kids!"
Hell manages to untangle himself but slumps to the floor. Slick stands on top of a bonnet nearby and sarcastically begins to cheer for Hell. Despite this being obvious sarcasm Tracy yells at Hell in response. Knee to the face by Tracy and Hell is them rammed face first into another car bonnet. Tracy then forces open a car boot and pulls out a golf club...
Slick-"Both these men look very comfortable holding a stick. Although rumor has it that the ones they are used to are much, much smaller..."
Before Tracy can use it Hell tackles Tracy to the floor! Hell picks up the golf club and whacks Adkins across the back with it! Hell then opens the car boot and throws Adkins right into it! What is Hell going to do here? It looks like he is staring at a nearby wall...surely not? Hell then turns to Slick and yells some abuse at him. Hell then goes back towards the car boot but it swings up hitting Hell right in the face...
Slick-"If Hell just payed attention to the task at hand, this match would be over."
Slick laughs at Hell as he falls to the floor. Hell took too long deciding what to do there. Tracy climbs out of the boot slowly obviously in some pain. This is taking a toll on both men neither are letting up one inch. Hell approaches kicking Adkins in the ribs. Hell then brutally throws Adkins right into another windshield smashing the glass on impact!
Slick-"Someone call Adkins a doctor! Ok Tracy you're a doctor! Ha ha ha ha ha"
Fortunately for Adkins (or perhaps unfortunately considering how warped he is) the impact was on his back not face first. Tracy is lying on top of the car and Hell goes for the cover! 1,2...and Adkins shows tremendous guts by kicking out...or maybe stupidity. Hell glares across at Slick again and then opens the car door. Hell shuts Tracy's arm in the door and then slams it right on the arm!
Slick-"Welcome to AWR Thursday night slam!"
Another cover...and Adkins certainly either has guts or is a certified lunatic. Slick is casually drinking another beer in the background and loudly belches into the mic. Hell then boots the car door closed as Adkins gets his arm away just in time! Adkins grabs Hell by the head and for the second time Hell's head is put through glass!
Slick-"This is like being on a night out with B-Man...don't you just love the sound of breaking glass in the evening! Natural reaction for Hell the moment he sees glass...it cracks!"
This time it was the door window rather than the windshield. How in the hell is Hell staying on his feet? Hell finally crumples to the floor but Adkins isn't able to make the cover quickly. Adkins pulls Hell to his feet (would have been wiser to keep him down) but Hell grabs Adkins by the arm and rams Tracy into a car window! Hell then does it a second time sending Adkins head through the glass...
Slick-"I am a doctor, but not that kind of doctor!"
Blood is pouring from Tracy's head the impact there was just sick. Is there a bloodmobile on the premises. Slick yells something about is there a doctor in the house? Both men are down a pool of blood forming around Tracy's head and the concrete. Hell with the cover...1,2...and how did Tracy kick out of that? The man is insane...
Slick-"You forgot to hook the leg there butterknife! Hey this is a nice vehicle..."
Slick meanwhile breaks into a car boot and finds a six pack of beers. He begins handing some to cameramen and other technical staff. Tracy and Hell fight to their feet and Tracy shoves Hell into another car. Are they trying to damage just about every car in this entire lot? Tracy throws Hell into the car and begins pounding on him inside!
Slick-"This isn't the first time Hell got a pounding in the back seat of a car *wink*
Slick makes a crude joke about Tracy and Hell in the backseat of a vehicle. Tracy begins ramming Hell face first into the wheel. Beep! Beep! Adkins yells something to Hell about how he must embrace the pain. Hell pulls out the car radio suddenly and rams Adkins in the head with it! Hell climbs out of the car (very uncomfortable for a seven footer) and Tracy follows.
Slick-"Hey turn on some of that country stuff! What's that guy called...country singer...Trace something?
Tracy rams Hell into another windshield. Tracy then charges at Hell but is backdropped right onto the hood of another car! This is just sick! Hell falls back just his head and shoulders covering Tracy...1,2...and another kickout! Hell then picks Tracy up and it looks like he is going to try and CHOKESLAM him on another car (how much will this cost AWR for damages it must be in the thousands!)
Slick-"Uh oh!"
Suddenly Slick charges forward and nails Hell in the head with a tire iron! Hell falls to the floor and Tracy lands on top of him in a pinning position! The ref makes the count...1,2...3!!!
Slick-"Whoops a daisy! My finger slipped...better watch what you're doing right Hell!"
WINNER BY PINFALL: TRACY ADKINS
Hell looks like he might have been knocked out cold. Adkins meanwhile gets to his feet looking extremely disorientated. Suddenly he is sprayed in the face with beer! Adkins turns round and furiously screams at Slick. Its well known Adkins despises alcohol and he's probably not happy at beating Hell with Slick's help! Tracy charges at Slick who delivers the DOC-TORE DRIVER right on yet another parked car! Adkins slumps to the concrete and Slick then proceeds to pour a beer on both men!
Referees and staff quickly come out and guide Slick away as Adkins looks like he's having a seizure from the beer being poured on him...
LIVE!
COMMENTATORS
AND
David Saturn-"Welcome to CRASH Tv where once again we are LIVE! I'm David Saturn along with my esteemed "colleague" Neal Steal..."
Neal Steal-"If you were expecting to be treated to an Anthony Royal match I'm afraid he will not be wrestling here tonight."
David Saturn-"Well we have 4 tremendous matches including another violent showdown between Tracy Adkins and Hell! This match will be a street fight!"
Neal Steal-"Well I'm just glad they won't be anywhere around us..."
David Saturn-"Fa Sho will be in action for the first time since being screwed at the PPV. He takes on the man who has been screwed more times than anyone...but only in his own mind...Robert Carr!"
Neal Steal-"Hopefully Robert will finally get the break he deserves but judging by the way this place is being run at the moment...what's this! Oh no he isn't scheduled out here!"
Slick's music hits as he appears at the top of the ramp with microphone in hand, and Steal tries to slither out of his seat.
Slick:"Whoa, whoa. whoa Neal. Stay right there. I'm not gonna hurt you. I actually have a little surprise for you."
Slick motions backstage...
Slick: I present to you, and all the fans in the stands, Mrs. Beverly Steal!!!!
A well dressed, old, but very well preserved woman comes out from the back. Steal's jaw drops to the floor.
David Saturn-"What the hell!"
Mrs Steal:"Hello there my little butterball! Long time no see! What is it 4 or 5 years? Looks like you have gained quite the reputation around here son..."
Steal still looks frozen with shock...clearly this is his actual real mother.
David Saturn-"Steal looks like he's seen a ghost!"
Mrs Steal-"Yes Neal you always had a bit of a reputation didn't you? What was it they called you when you were suspended from school all those years ago? Ah yes a disgusting little pervert wasn't it? I was so humiliated! I never brought up my son to go peeking into girls bathrooms!"
Neal Steal-"I was set up by those boys when that happened!"
David Saturn-"This is maybe the best thing I've ever seen..."
Steal looks like he's about to cry...
Mrs Steal-"Remember when you stole that money from us and spent it on that stash of viagra? I don't even know what that is but you were taking it every night! You certainly live up to the family name that's for sure...just in all the wrong ways!"
Steal is now sobbing at the announce table as Saturn loudly laughs...
Mrs Steal-"Oh look Neal's turning on the waterworks? Maybe that's why his bed was wet so often when he woke up in the morning...had to buy new sheets every 2 weeks..."
Neal Steal-"That's not true! You don't know what you're saying!"
David Saturn-"Looks like she knows exactly what she's saying!"
Mrs Steal-"One time he tried to pay his own sister to take him to the prom...even she refused!"
David Saturn-"That's pathetic even by your standards!"
Mrs Steal-"You know Neal when you got yourself on Tv we wondered who you must have blackmailed. Still we tried very hard to be proud at first but you know what? I would be prouder to have a son like Slick than someone like you! At least he lives his life to the full and know how to have a good time!"
David Saturn-"Ha ha ha ha ha!"
Tears are rolling down Steal's cheeks...he has probably never been so humiliated...
Mrs Steal-"I was surprised to get a call from Slick last week after you pulled your latest disgusting stunt. We disowned you years ago but what you did last week was low even for you! I actually do have a terminal illness for the record..."
Neal Steal-"What?"
David Saturn-"You really are a jackass aren't you? How could you do that to your own mother?"
Mrs Steal-"Had no idea did you? 6 months from now I'll probably be 6 feet under...and you know what? You're banned from the funeral!"
Neal Steal-"No!"
Mrs Steal-"You won't be getting anything from the will either so don't get your hopes up there sonny!"
David Saturn-"This is priceless...surprised your Mother actually looks like a normal person Steal..."
Mrs Steal-"So now the whole world knows Neal...even your own Mother hates your guts!"
Steal sobs loudly into the mic as the entire crowd laugh at him.
Mrs Steal-"Oh and Mr Saturn you're welcome at the Steal household for lunch anytime you like!"
David Saturn-"Thanks Mrs Steal!"
Steal lets out an agonised yell...
Mrs Steal-"Oh and one more thing...your father and grandfather will be turning in their graves! I'm actually sorry I even gave birth to you! Should have had that abortion like they suggested..."
Mrs Steal leaves as Saturn and the entire crowd continue to laugh. Steal wipes his eyes and glares over at Saturn...
Neal Steal-"She's terminally ill. That's what she just said so obviously the chemotherapy has had a severe mental effect...my Mother loves me dearly."
David Saturn-"She had a funny way of showing it! How would you know whether she had chemo anyway? You had no idea she was terminally ill! You are a total liar!"
Neal Steal-"How could Slick take advantage of a sick elderly woman like that. She had no idea what she was saying. She was showing signs of dementia last time I saw her..."
David Saturn-"I knew you were hated Steal but my god! Even I didn't think your own mother would hate you!"
Neal Steal-"She does not hate me! This is all Slick's fault! How could he do this to me? Using my sick Mother like this..."
David Saturn-"You got what you deserved! Don't think you will be interfering in Slick's business again...wait here comes Rattlesnake!"
VS
From Sweetwater, Texas...RATTLESNAKE!!!
Neal Steal-"I don't like Rattlesnake much but he would never stoop as low as Slick just did..."
David Saturn-"Well he has something in common with you...selective eyesight. Snake accused RCH of cheating to beat him last week...no idea what he is referring to it looked like a clean pin to me..."
Neal Steal-"Well RCH tried to use the tights at one stage..."
David Saturn-"Well if that's all it is Snake does not have a very strong case I'm afraid...here comes Gunner!"
From Portland, Oregon...Gunner...HUGHES!!![/center]
Neal Steal-"I'm not sure why Gunner decided to team with Rattlesnake tonight. He's clearly everything Rattlesnake isn't intelligent and cool under pressure..."
David Saturn-"Maybe Rattlesnake will learn from it he does have a tendency to get hot headed...well Combs isn't wasting any time..."
From Los Angeles, California...Killa...Jay...COMBS!!!
David Saturn-"We didn't hear much from Combs this past week but I'm guessing that hand is in exceptionally bad condition..."
Neal Steal-"Obviously after what Gunner did last week...what a brawl that was it took several minutes to separate them after the show ended..."
David Saturn-"...and what a tremendous reaction for the hatchet warrior...RCH3!"
From the Dark Forest....RCH...3333333333!!!
Gunner and Rattlesnake are talking on the outside as RCH waves his hatchet around. Combs seems a little unfocused perhaps concerned about his injured hand. Combs seems to be wearing a protected glove but that won't be of much use against the likes of Gunner and Snake. It looks like Snake is going over strategy...
David Saturn-"I'm not sure Snake has much of a strategy other than to beat the hell out of his opponent..."
Neal Steal-"That's what Gunner prefers as well but we saw another side of Gunner last week..."
David Saturn-"Well he used more sophisticated offence than Snake usually does..."
Neal Steal-"Snake is just like Slick...an ugly unkempt brawler..."
David Saturn-"Don't think your Mother has left yet Steal...maybe sharing a few cold ones with Slick backstage..."
Neal Steal-"I'm struggling to concentrate on this match after that horrible news I had earlier about my mothers terminal illness..."
David Saturn-"Oh shut up! You made it up last week why would you care now?"
Neal Steal-"At least my Mother is still alive...heard yours died years ago..."
Snake has been known to order around tag partners in the past. It wasn't wise saying he had ordered Hell to do things in the past and he better be careful not to repeat the same mistake. Still Rattlesnake is not exactly known for his diplomacy. Both men suddenly charge under the bottom and RCH and Combs meet them with kicks and stomps...
David Saturn-"My mother is alive and well and frankly that's none of your damn business..."
Neal Steal-"Oh but its alright for your drunken oaf buddy to exploit my mothers illness..."
David Saturn-"Its ok for her to show up and verbally tear you a new asshole yes! After what you did last week..."
Gunner fights to his feet but RCH clotheslines him over the top rope! Rattlesnake is also thrown to the outside. A flurry of fists are exchanged and RCH is rammed head first into the announce table by Gunner. Combs goes to ram Rattlesnake into the ringpost but Combs managed to block. Elbow to the ribs of Snake by Combs who then rolls Snake back into the ring...
David Saturn-"Certainly not a very scientific matchup so far. The first tag match we have had since the company reopened..."
Neal Steal-"I just hope it does not go out of control. I haven't seen Maggia anywhere tonight he should be making his presence felt and restoring some order around here..."
David Saturn-"You want him to blatantly favour Anthony Royal in other words...still not sure what's going on Silvio Megala still hasn't been heard from in weeks..."
The referee manages to restore some order on the outside as Combs and Snake exchange punches. Snake suddenly bites Combs across the hand (the referee failing to notice somehow) and Snake then delivers several knees to the ribs. Gunner and RCH are in their respective corners now and Combs is whipped towards Gunner.
Neal Steal-"Nice teamwork! Snake you better keep listening to Gunner...last thing we need is Snake thinking for himself..."
David Saturn-"You don't have to be Einstein to physically compete in the AWR! Snake still calling out Jason Howard for some reason that was the match he really wanted here tonight..."
Neal Steal-"We will see Jason in action later tonight against Dustin Weaver of course..."
Gunner nails Combs with a shot to the back of the head then Snake charges forward with a running knee to the face. Snake tags in Gunner who clubs Combs hard across the head. Gunner grabs Combs by the injured hand and whips him off the ropes. Armdrag takedown by Gunner as Combs rebounds back at him.
Neal Steal-"Bet you're surprised by that aren't you Saturn. You thought Gunner was just a smashmouth brawler that was a expertly executed takedown..."
David Saturn-"Ah yes pure sweet science there. Not like its one of the first things they teach in wrestling school...and I never said that about Hughes at all. You're a liar and your momma said so!"
Neal Steal-"Stop mentioning my Mother or I'll..."
David Saturn-"Well I would like to see you try! Remember you hit me and it will be YOU who's fired! I'm not going to hit you by the way no matter how hard you try tonight I managed for 12 years until that recent incident..."
Combs quickly gets to his feet clearly realising Gunner is targeting the hand. Combs blocks a right hand then gives Gunner a stiff shot with his good hand. Gunner is rammed head first into the corner turnbuckle and RCH is brought into the action with a tag. RCH drives his head into Gunner's ribs and then delivers a swinging neck breaker!
Neal Steal-"Gunner up very fast! Gunner is a very serious competitor and clearly dislikes RCH..."
David Saturn-"RCH is a serious competitor as well. You can't be a world champion without being a serious competitor..."
Neal Steal-"He isn't the world champion Mr Royal is..."
David Saturn-"Obviously I'm referring to his title victories in previous federations...he hasn't had time to win a world title here yet!"
Neal Steal-"He won't either while Mr Royal is around..."
Cover by RCH...1 and Gunner is already up. Gunner quickly whips RCH into the corner and tags in Rattlesnake. Quick headlock takedown and armbar applied by RCH and he takes Snake into the corner tagging in Combs. Kick to the ribs by Killa but Snake fires back with right hand. Combs retaliates with a chop and a thrust to the neck...
David Saturn-"Combs certainly doing a good job of protecting that hand...better than last week..."
Neal Steal-"Well Snake better tag Gunner in he will tear at it without mercy. I don't know why Combs is teaming with RCH he's made mistakes associating with the wrong people in the past."
Punches to the face by Combs and then he rams Snake head first into the corner turnbuckle. Combs tags in RCH who delivers a hard knee to the face. Cover by RCH...1,2...and Snake kicks out. RCH then tags in Combs again (rapid tags here) who immediately pounds on Snake. The referee somehow fails to notice a blatant low blow there by Snake...
David Saturn-"No doubt you would be moaning about that if Gunner wasn't the partner of Snake here tonight...."
Neal Steal-"Snake should be careful Gunner will not be pleased if Snake stupidly gets disqualified. What is Snake doing here..."
David Saturn-"Snake is no aerial specialist. That's not Snake's strength...there's more chance of you coming up with some decent WRESTLING analysis..."
Neal Steal-"You're the hold for hold guy..."
David Saturn-"I don't need to call every hold as it happens. Some might use that style but people can see things for themselves too..."
Snake then tosses Combs to the outside through the middle rope. Snake climbs onto the middle rope and leaps off completely missing Combs with a double axe handle. Rattlesnake is not known for his aerial prowess and that's why. RCH goes over to assist Combs but is immediately met by Gunner. Another flurry of punches follow...
David Saturn-"Well Snake did notice the referee counting there..."
Neal Steal-"He knows how to count to 10?"
David Saturn-"Of course he does!"
Neal Steal-"I think Gunner must have warned him..."
Snake gets back into the ring noticing the ref has started to count. Combs delivers a big right hand to Gunner. Meanwhile RCH picks up his hatchet and Snake turns towards him and starts cursing...the distraction works as Combs takes out Snake's leg from the outside. Combs wraps Snake's leg around the ringpost as Gunner and RCH quickly follow...
Neal Steal-"Get up Snake...you don't see Gunner lying on his back!"
David Saturn-"His leg has anyone else can is being wrapped around the ringpost!"
Neal Steal-"Well unwrap it then!"
Gunner nails Combs with a right hand as RCH continues working on Snake's leg. RCH rams Snake's knee hard into the ringpost. Combs and Gunner are forced to break up by the ref and Combs being the legal man gets back into the ring. Hard clothesline by Combs knocks Snake right to the mat...Snake was distracted easily again by RCH...
Neal Steal-"Snake distracted easily again...still hard not to be by this clown..."
David Saturn-"He is NOT a clown! That is the reaction of simplistic fools like yourself. Cheap shot there by Combs...I do wonder what will happen if Hughes ever snaps..."
Neal Steal-"Foolish by Combs...already RCH is being a bad influence..."
David Saturn-"I never heard RCH tell him to do that...Combs is more than capable of making decisions for himself..."
Combs delivers a cheap shot to Gunner on the apron. That does not provoke Gunner at all as he fixes Combs with an icy glare. Combs tags in RCH who drops his knee across Snake's throat. RCH and Combs have certainly been aggressive here and their teamwork has probably been more evident.
Neal Steal-"See how generous Gunner is. He was very kind helping out someone like Snake who will not be grateful for the assistance..."
David Saturn-"Well he won't get much gratitude from Snake that's for sure..."
RCH then tries to wrap his legs around Snake's leg. Snake does not like mat wrestling and quickly falls forward driving his head into the ribs of RCH. Well actually that may have been a little low...1,2..reversal...1,2...and Snake is quick to kick out. Snake was very nearly caught out by that reversal there.
Neal Steal-"Ha ha ha! Gunner must have taught him that!"
David Saturn-"Snake is very predictable but now and again he manges to do something just a little bit surprising..."
Neal Steal-"It used to be a surprise when he actually won a match...his record isn't so bad here in AWR..."
David Saturn-"RCH certainly knows how to expect the unexpected...hardly conventional himself in the ring..."
Surprisingly Snake executes a clever rollup himself...1,2...and RCH kicks out. Snake begins pounding on RCH clearly getting frustrated. Snake is easily angered and still seems very wary of RCH. Snake has a headlock on RCH and then he grabs hold of the ropes. A bit hypocritical of Snake to accuse RCH of cheating last week he has bent the rules a bit in this match...
David Saturn-"Gunner of course completely dismissive of RCH...maybe he is beginning to gain some respect for RCH as a wrestler here..."
Neal Steal-"Gunner clearly admitted RCH is a good wrestler...he just despises that silly makeup as much as I do...no doubt the merchandise staff are selling toy hatchets these fans will buy any cheap tat..."
David Saturn-"They could steal from their family and buy viagra instead..."
Neal Steal-"Shut up Saturn."
RCH manages to roll to the outside and he rams Snake into the announce table. Gunner suddenly charges down from the apron nailing RCH with two clubbing blows to the back. Combs is quick to assist and pounds on Gunner who manages to stay on his feet. Meanwhile behind the referees back Snake nails RCH with a chair!
Neal Steal-"Yahoo! Gunner didn't tell him to do that of course he wouldn't need a weapon but hopefully that's knocked out the clown!"
David Saturn-"Blatant cheating but at least Rattlesnake is honest about it...unlike some people...cough Royal...cough..."
Combs is in the ring and executes a brainbuster on Rattlesnake! Combs isn't the legal man but the ref has lost track of the action here. Combs with the cover...1,2...but Snake gets his foot across the ropes. Gunner tags himself in reaching through the ropes (Combs does not notice but the ref does) and charges off the ropes.
Neal Steal-"Yahoo! That's even worse than being smashed with a chair!"
David Saturn-"Just so much FEROCITY behind that kick!"
Combs spins round and Hughes nails him right in the face with the BUCKSHOT! Gunner makes the cover...1,2...3!!! RCH is getting up on the outside and he picks up the hatchet! RCH charges into the ring and Rattlesnake and Gunner quickly retreat. Neither man backs down generally but anyone would leave the ring when they are being charged at by a hatchet wielding maniac.
Neal Steal-"Sore loser!"
David Saturn-"Well he did get smashed by a chair..."
Neal Steal-"Which wasn't Gunner's fault..."
David Saturn-"I never said it was!"
WINNERS BY PINFALL: GUNNER HUGHES & RATTLESNAKE
Rattlesnake throws a table into the ring but Gunner has a quiet word in his ear. Snake surprisingly listens and both men retreat back up the ramp. For a moment Gunner walks behind Snake and looks like he is contemplating kicking Snake in the head. The fans clearly aren't sure what to expect from Hughes and Snake quickly looks back seeming a little wary as well...
Neal Steal-"Ha ha I was hoping Gunner was going to kick him there..."
David Saturn-"Snake getting his usual mix of boos and cheers...it would have been most unfair of Gunner had he kicked him. Looked like he was considering it..."
Neal Steal-"Oh look at that! RCH would be strongly fined for that until competent administration. Are you going to let that go unpunished as well Maggia?"
David Saturn-"I don't endorse what RCH just did there but he certainly has a right to be frustrated..."
RCH and Combs meanwhile are arguing with the referee in the ring...the ref goes to leave but RCH plants him into the mat with the WICKED WILD!!! RCH and Combs certainly do have a grievance with the referee failing to notice Snake's blatant chair shot. Both men make their way up the ramp...
Neal Steal-"Just a very sore loser! Gunner Hughes deserved to win that match and RCH shouldn't take it out on the referee..."
David Saturn-"I believe it was a tag team match or have you already forgotten that? Rattlesnake carried his share of the burden..."
Neal Steal-"Well it was Gunner who got the pin that's what the record books will say..."
David Saturn-"It will say that Gunner Hughes AND Rattlesnake won...wait something going on in the back?
We fade to the back where we see Sergio Esposito. He at the catering table looking over the food options. Suddenly, from seemingly out of nowhere, he is blasted in the back of the head with a led pipe. The camera pans to see an enraged Royal standing over Sergio with the pipe in his hand. He picks Sergio up by the hair and once again smashes him with the pipe, this time in the face. Royal then mounts Sergio and begins reigning down right hands on him. Sergio is busted open badly as Royal has a crazed look in his eyes. Royal picks Sergio up one more time, places the pipe under his chin, and begins choking whatever life he had left in him out of him. Finally, Royal tosses Sergio forcefully. The back of Sergio’s head cracks off the wall with a sickening thud. Royal looks down on his victim and walks away with a faraway look on his face.
**************************************************************************************************************************
MOMENTS AGO:
We see a repeat of Royal's shocking attack on Sergio Esposito. The scene then cuts back to the announcers with Saturn looking absolutely disgusted. Steal himself looks rather surprised...
David Saturn-"What the hell was that all about? He just attacked the guy for no reason!"
Neal Steal-"Well maybe it was like last week with Fa Sho. Maybe Sergio said something slanderous about Mr Royal he did seem a little but cocky...
David Saturn-"Whatever it was Royal just absolutely snapped. There must be a reason...even people like Royal don't just explode with rage like that for no reason...then again this is the guy who assaulted several superstars last year without provocation..."
Neal Steal-"Not a great couple of weeks for Esposito. First his manager was injured and now this...I would be surprised if he returned..."
David Saturn-"No thanks to your hero. Anyway I believe we are going to have a guest announcer for the upcoming street fight....
Neal Steal-"What I never gave permission for that!"
David Saturn-He didn't ask for your permission! I'm going to just sit back and enjoy this...
Neal Steal-"I'm not announcing either if its who I think it is...especially after what he did to me earlier tonight!"
STREET FIGHT
VS
We see Tracy Adkins in the parking lot with a lead pipe in hand awaiting the arrival of Hell. Tracy begins talking trash to the cameramen mentioning something about the purity of pain. The cameramen exchange bemused looks in response. Suddenly some fans watching (wisely keeping some distance) cheer as Slick Doctor shows up with a mic!
Slick Doctor-"What's up Tracy old buddy old pal?"
It looks like Slick has taken it upon himself to supply the commentary for this match. Tracy starts cursing at Slick who sarcastically bows to Tracy in response. The crowd cheer again (though not as loudly as Slick's reception) as Hell marches into the parking lot. Hell looks over at Slick not appearing surprised by his presence (no doubt knowing Slick wouldn't forget Hell's interference costing him the title) but motions warning him not to get involved.
Slick-"Hey I'm not deaf you big oaf! Where's your cowboy hat this week Trace?"
Slick loudly insults both men as they approach each other. Tracy looks at Hell with a sick smile which just about sums up their twisted relationship. Slick suddenly yells at Hell gesturing towards something but as Hell turns around nothing is there. Tracy charges nailing Hell with his lead pipe in the ribs. Slick laughs at being able to distract Hell quite so easily...
Slick-"Ha ha ha ha ha! He's certainly not the hottest fire in hell! That's right Tracy go for the kidney...some actual signs of thinking there by Tracy Adkins!"
Slick chugs beer with one hand, mic in the other as he continues to insult both men. Hell grabs his kidney area where he has an history of injuries. Tracy slams Hell face first into a parked automobile. Tracy then turns to Slick mentioning something about his father being an abusive drunk. Right hand by Tracy with some power there actually staggering Hell for a moment...
Slick-"Remember, don't drink and drive! Make sure to always have a designated driver. Preferably a nice broad who brings you back to her pad."
Hell is rammed into another parked car as Slick calls for the viewers never to drink and drive! Clubbing right hands by Tracy but Hell responds with a powerful uppercut. Tracy did well to stay on his feet there. Slick meanwhile is lying outstretched across a car bonnet casually calling the action. Hell clubs Tracy across the back and then tosses Tracy right onto a car windshield!
Slick-"Geez, this is about as exciting as a Silvio Megala match! Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"
Tracy does not smash through but the windshield is clearly cracked. Slick starts snoring agitating Hell who is getting more and more irritated by Slick's presence here. Hell kicks Tracy hard in the ribs twice and then sends him sprawling across a car bonnet. Hell rams Tracy into another car bonnet but then turns towards Slick threatening to attack him if he makes another insulting remark...
Slick-"That'll leave a mark! Whoa whoa whoa Hell keep your eye on the right guy this week! Maybe he'll be blind. At least he won't have to look at himself in the mirror..."
Tracy then picks up a piece of loose metal and hits Hell in the face with it. That sharp point looks like it almost caught Hell in the eye. As the camera zooms in we can see Tracy has indeed drawn blood from just underneath the eye. Tracy then throws Hell hard into a windshield! Tracy then climbs onto the bonnet and stupidly attempts to suplex Hell onto the concrete...
Slick-"Dumbass. What do you expect from a product of an inbred home."
That is hardly likely to work on a 7 footer like Hell. Slick laughs loudly at Adkins for attempting that move. Hell of course blocks and reverses the move vertically suplexing Adkins on the car bonnet! As Tracy contorts clutching his back in pain (maybe he is getting pleasure from it) Hell breaks into a car boot and finds a baseball bat in the trunk...
Slick-(singing) "Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack, I don't care if I never get back!"
Hell gives Slick a smug little grin which for the first time gets a slightly angry reaction out of Slick. Hell approaches Tracy who manages to block as Hell tries to nail him with the baseball bat. Low blow by Tracy which of course won't be a DQ in this match and then Adkins hits Hell right in the kidney with the baseball bat...
Slick-"Owwwwww have mercy!"
Tracy is bleeding from the lower arm and mouth. Hell meanwhile splutters from the bat shot but no sign of internal bleeding. He is still busted open below the eye. Hells suddenly shoves Tracy away with such force he bounces right off the hood of a parked car! Slick winces loud at the impact drawing quite a bit of laughter from the cameramen...
Slick-"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh...remember Silver Stone? I have a fond memory of bashing him over the head with a shovel..."
Hell threatens the cameramen to shut up (or else) which wisely they do. Slick wriggles his fingers feigning cowardice. Hell walks back to the open car boot and pulls out a shovel. Hell walks back towards Tracy and swings the shovel narrowly missing Adkins and hitting a car bonnet instead! Tracy ducks another shot then foolishly tries to start a fistfight with Hell...
Slick-"There's about as much chance of Tracy winning a fistfight with Hell as Skull turning down a free all you can eat buffet!"
Hell again pushes Tracy away and warns Slick to keep his distance again. Slick yawns at being threatened yet again. Hell charges and Adkins looks like he's about to try a back body drop! More more likely he lifts Hell up just enough to drop him face first on the car windshield! Hell's head smashes through the glass prompting laughter from Slick...
Slick-"Oh my god! Hell better have the skills to pay the bills! Hopefully Steal's car is out here somewhere!"
Slick's behaviour here is endearingly obnoxious. Hell manages to get to his feet as Tracy tries to nail him with the shovel! Hell moves which is a good thing as Tracy completely smashed one of the car lights with that swing! Hell punches Tracy in the ribs and rams him head first into another bonnet. Hell is busted open badly and could well have broken glass stuck in his skin...
Slick-"This isn't clean cut family entertainment! Welcome to Baddlands!
Slick amusingly makes comments about this being unfit for family viewing. Hell walks towards Tracy who pulls open a car door ramming it into Hell. Tracy tries to shut Hell's head in the car door choking him instead as Hell tries to fight back. Tracy pulls out the seatbelt and wraps it around Hell's neck. Tracy shuts the car door with the seatbelt stuck in the door gap and around Hell's neck...
Slick-"Remember always wear a seatbelt kids!"
Hell manages to untangle himself but slumps to the floor. Slick stands on top of a bonnet nearby and sarcastically begins to cheer for Hell. Despite this being obvious sarcasm Tracy yells at Hell in response. Knee to the face by Tracy and Hell is them rammed face first into another car bonnet. Tracy then forces open a car boot and pulls out a golf club...
Slick-"Both these men look very comfortable holding a stick. Although rumor has it that the ones they are used to are much, much smaller..."
Before Tracy can use it Hell tackles Tracy to the floor! Hell picks up the golf club and whacks Adkins across the back with it! Hell then opens the car boot and throws Adkins right into it! What is Hell going to do here? It looks like he is staring at a nearby wall...surely not? Hell then turns to Slick and yells some abuse at him. Hell then goes back towards the car boot but it swings up hitting Hell right in the face...
Slick-"If Hell just payed attention to the task at hand, this match would be over."
Slick laughs at Hell as he falls to the floor. Hell took too long deciding what to do there. Tracy climbs out of the boot slowly obviously in some pain. This is taking a toll on both men neither are letting up one inch. Hell approaches kicking Adkins in the ribs. Hell then brutally throws Adkins right into another windshield smashing the glass on impact!
Slick-"Someone call Adkins a doctor! Ok Tracy you're a doctor! Ha ha ha ha ha"
Fortunately for Adkins (or perhaps unfortunately considering how warped he is) the impact was on his back not face first. Tracy is lying on top of the car and Hell goes for the cover! 1,2...and Adkins shows tremendous guts by kicking out...or maybe stupidity. Hell glares across at Slick again and then opens the car door. Hell shuts Tracy's arm in the door and then slams it right on the arm!
Slick-"Welcome to AWR Thursday night slam!"
Another cover...and Adkins certainly either has guts or is a certified lunatic. Slick is casually drinking another beer in the background and loudly belches into the mic. Hell then boots the car door closed as Adkins gets his arm away just in time! Adkins grabs Hell by the head and for the second time Hell's head is put through glass!
Slick-"This is like being on a night out with B-Man...don't you just love the sound of breaking glass in the evening! Natural reaction for Hell the moment he sees glass...it cracks!"
This time it was the door window rather than the windshield. How in the hell is Hell staying on his feet? Hell finally crumples to the floor but Adkins isn't able to make the cover quickly. Adkins pulls Hell to his feet (would have been wiser to keep him down) but Hell grabs Adkins by the arm and rams Tracy into a car window! Hell then does it a second time sending Adkins head through the glass...
Slick-"I am a doctor, but not that kind of doctor!"
Blood is pouring from Tracy's head the impact there was just sick. Is there a bloodmobile on the premises. Slick yells something about is there a doctor in the house? Both men are down a pool of blood forming around Tracy's head and the concrete. Hell with the cover...1,2...and how did Tracy kick out of that? The man is insane...
Slick-"You forgot to hook the leg there butterknife! Hey this is a nice vehicle..."
Slick meanwhile breaks into a car boot and finds a six pack of beers. He begins handing some to cameramen and other technical staff. Tracy and Hell fight to their feet and Tracy shoves Hell into another car. Are they trying to damage just about every car in this entire lot? Tracy throws Hell into the car and begins pounding on him inside!
Slick-"This isn't the first time Hell got a pounding in the back seat of a car *wink*
Slick makes a crude joke about Tracy and Hell in the backseat of a vehicle. Tracy begins ramming Hell face first into the wheel. Beep! Beep! Adkins yells something to Hell about how he must embrace the pain. Hell pulls out the car radio suddenly and rams Adkins in the head with it! Hell climbs out of the car (very uncomfortable for a seven footer) and Tracy follows.
Slick-"Hey turn on some of that country stuff! What's that guy called...country singer...Trace something?
Tracy rams Hell into another windshield. Tracy then charges at Hell but is backdropped right onto the hood of another car! This is just sick! Hell falls back just his head and shoulders covering Tracy...1,2...and another kickout! Hell then picks Tracy up and it looks like he is going to try and CHOKESLAM him on another car (how much will this cost AWR for damages it must be in the thousands!)
Slick-"Uh oh!"
Suddenly Slick charges forward and nails Hell in the head with a tire iron! Hell falls to the floor and Tracy lands on top of him in a pinning position! The ref makes the count...1,2...3!!!
Slick-"Whoops a daisy! My finger slipped...better watch what you're doing right Hell!"
WINNER BY PINFALL: TRACY ADKINS
Hell looks like he might have been knocked out cold. Adkins meanwhile gets to his feet looking extremely disorientated. Suddenly he is sprayed in the face with beer! Adkins turns round and furiously screams at Slick. Its well known Adkins despises alcohol and he's probably not happy at beating Hell with Slick's help! Tracy charges at Slick who delivers the DOC-TORE DRIVER right on yet another parked car! Adkins slumps to the concrete and Slick then proceeds to pour a beer on both men!
Referees and staff quickly come out and guide Slick away as Adkins looks like he's having a seizure from the beer being poured on him...