Post by Silvio Megala on Sept 27, 2012 22:16:51 GMT -4
AWR CRASH TV #16
LIVE!
David Saturn-"Hello everyone and welcome to CRASH Tv! Tonight the grudge between Slick Doctor and Hell intensifies when they go one on one!"
Neal Steal-"Also tonight the AWR World Champion Mr Anthony Royal has been unjustifiably forced to place his championship on the line."
David Saturn-"RCH3 takes on Dustin Weaver while we will also see the number 1 contender Fa Sho in action! As a matter of fact he's coming up right now!"
Neal Steal-"Don't forget I promised a surprise for you here tonight Saturn!"
David Saturn-(Sarcastically)"I can hardly wait..."
From St Louis, Missouri...Kris...Fa Shooooooooooooooo...DESTINY!!!
Neal Steal-"That ring announcer is so biased. I'm amazed he isn't wearing some of that tacky Fa Sho merchandise we are seeing here tonight..."
David Saturn-"Well perhaps he is a Fa Sho fan and you know what? So am I...good to see Sho looks well after that disgraceful beatdown he took last week..."
Neal Steal-"Sho was making rude gestures to Mr Royal all night so he got what he deserved...
From Los Angeles, California...Killa...Jay...COMBS!!!
David Saturn-"Here comes Jay Combs these are 2 men who know each other very well..."
Neal Steal-"Fa Sho was literally dripping with contempt for Combs earlier this week. Completely disrespectful towards a former world champion like Combs...
David Saturn-"They have been exchanging barbs for a few weeks since Combs arrived here. No real surprise this match didn't take long to be booked..."
As Sho enters the ring Combs immediately attacks pounding away on Destiny. Obviously Combs is angry with the comments Sho made earlier this week barely giving Sho time to remove his ring jacket. Combs takes the jacket and chokes Sho with it neck backed against the top rope. The ref breaks it up and Combs nails Sho with 2 big left hands. Combs whips Sho off the ropes...
Neal Sreal-"Combs has started on fire here! Sho is going to regret those comments...
David Saturn-"Why has he paid off a bunch of thugs to beat down his enemies as well?"
Neal Steal-"Combs is dominating...oh look at that cheap shot kick to the face..."
David Saturn-"Not a thing wrong with it Steal..."
Sho ducks a clothesline, rebounds and connects with a kick to the face. Combs with a left hand (not his preferred hand the right is still bandaged) but Sho executes a takedown! Sho is going for an armbar trying to apply pressure perhaps to the damaged right hand. Sho grasps at the bandage trying to remove it but Combs grabs the ropes. The ref forces Sho to break the hold...
David Saturn-"Sho openly saying he hopes Royal actually wins later tonight. Sho wants to get his hands on Royal more than anyone...
Neal Steal-"That shows how arrogant he is. He should be hoping Randal wins...not that it will happen of course...look at these fans booing Combs he is wrestling injured..."
David Saturn-"Combs has not said a word to AWR cameras for a couple of weeks now. Not sure what condition the hand is in. Sho perhaps should be targeting it more but perhaps he is trying to beat Combs without going for the easy option of targeting that hand..."
Combs quickly drops to the outside gaining some boos from the crowd. Sho follows and Combs immediately goes back into the ring. As Sho enters Combs charges, Sho drops down, Combs leaps over, rebounds and Sho raises his foot catching Combs in the ribs. Big superkick to the face by Sho and then pounds on Combs in the corner. Combs is whipped into the opposite corner...
Neal Steal-"Ha ha ha! Watch where you're going! Ha ha ha!"
David Saturn-"I don't think Sho unlike Royal is as cocky as he sounded this past week. He knows deep down he is facing a very tough, experienced opponent in Jay Combs..."
Neal Steal-"Combs really needs to get off the mark with a win...he should be number 1 contender if he wins as well..."
David Saturn-"That won't be the case. Sho is locked in for that title shot next week...signed and sealed no matter who the champion is..."
Neal Steal-"Mr Royal of course...who else?"
David Saturn-"The guy he's defending the title against tonight perhaps? Red Randal..."
Sho charges too quickly and Combs swings out his leg catching Sho in the face with his boot. Blows to the chest by Combs, whip off the ropes and Sho slips behind Combs leaping on his back. Sho is looking for a crucifix type pin here and gets Combs shoulders down...1,2...and Combs kicks out! Nice move there by Sho who is knocked down with a clothesline as both men get to their feet...
David Saturn-"Sho is such an all rounder. Is there really two better pure wrestlers in the AWR than Sho and Royal right now..."
Neal Steal-"About time you gave Mr Royal the credit he deserves..."
David Saturn-"I've always said he has the attributes which is why he shouldn't have to cheat! Oh by the way how is Silvio going to feel about you still backing Royal?"
Combs throws Sho through the middle rope and to the outside. Combs is catching a quick breather and Sho heads back into the ring. Kicks to the back by Combs and then he applies a rear chinlock. Combs is applying a lot of pressure here but Sho manages to rise to his feet. Club to the head by Combs, whips Sho off the ropes, Sho ducks a martial arts kick and delivers a flying crossbody on the rebound!
Neal Steal-"Kick out Combs! Yahoo! See Sho he's no pushover!"
David Saturn-"This is an excellent wrestling match. Most of the action inside the ring..."
Neal Steal-"Vampires like you won't like that...look at these bloodthirsty violent fans..."
David Saturn-"I said it was an excellent wrestling match you fool! Yes I like brawls but I damn sure have an appreciation for good wrestling! At least I know what most of the moves are called!"
1,2...and Combs kicks out! Combs is up very fast and knocks down Sho with a right hand. Another rear chinlock applied by Combs in the very centre of the ring. Sho again fights to his feet but is knocked back down with a kick to the ribs. Combs takes Sho by the arm, pulls him to his feet and knocks him back down again with a kick to the back. Combs then pulls Sho back up again...
Neal Steal-"Kick to the ribs there by Combs...called that right didn't I?"
David Saturn-"WOW! We are getting one hell of an anatomy lesson from Steal here tonight folks! Of course the anatomy part he's most familiar with would be the ass..."
Neal Steal-"Shut up Saturn..."
Another kick to the ribs from Combs and then he punches Sho in the face. Spinning heel kick by Combs,,,1,2...and Sho places his foot on the ropes. Combs argues with the ref for no apparent reason then whips Sho off the ropes. Combs goes for a back body drop but Sho slides down the back looking for a sunset flip! Combs counters with a blow right to the face...
David Saturn-"Combs with a very effective counter there...nothing fancy about that one!"
Neal Steal-"Hope he punches Sho in the throat next maybe that might shut him up with his arrogant comments..."
David Saturn-"Shame nobody has punched you in the throat..."
Neal Steal-"Why don't you take a shot then?"
David Saturn-"I'm not going to get myself fired...believe me I have learnt self restraint sitting out here with a moron like you!"
Neal Steal-"Bet you attack me later when you see what my surprise is..."
Combs rebounds off the ropes and goes for an elbowdrop but Sho protects himself by raising his knees. Combs clutches his elbow and chest and both men are on their feet. Right hands by Sho, whip off the ropes and drives Combs into the mat with a spinebuster! Cover...1,2...and Combs just kicks out. Right hand by Sho, whip off the ropes...hurricanrana! Combs is up again...Sho hooks underneath the arm...sambo suplex!
David Saturn-"Sho with a great technical move there...and now he has the submission locked in!"
Neal Steal-"Grab the ropes! Quick! Damn it!"
David Saturn-"We have our winner...Fa Sho!"
Sho quickly applies the LOCKDOWN to Combs! There's nowhere for Sho to go and after a few moments he taps out! Sho with another submission victory here on CRASH Tv!
WINNER BY SUBMISSION: FA SHO
Neal Steal-"I hope he does not believe he is going to make Mr Royal submit with that move. That is the second time he has used it..."
David Saturn-"He may well be using it to send a message to Royal..."
Neal Steal-"Mr Royal has never submitted in his life..."
David Saturn-"Except when he did against Slick when you saved his ass..."
Neal Steal-"He was trying to get the referees attention while he was down. That's all I was trying to do before you brutally attacked me. You're going to pay for that in a few minutes..."
David Saturn-"Right. Well we will be right back in just a few moments! Stay tuned!"
**************************************************************************************************************************
We return from commercial to a chorus of boos as Steal is standing in the centre of the ring with a mic.
Neal Steal-"Last week my poor Mother was the victim of serious exploitation! Now I know Slick was the one who paid for her flight! However I am not in the slightest doubt that it was your idea Saturn! You were just too much of a cheapskate to pay for the plane so you had to get your best buddy to do it for you!
The scene cuts to a shot of Saturn rolling his eyes.
Neal Steal-"Since Saturn wants to mess with my family I've decided to give him a taste of his own medicine! I said on twitter I would have a LARGE surprise for you ha ha ha ha ha! Without further ado I introduce to you none other than YOUR FATHER! Humphrey Saturn!!!"
A gigantic man waddles out onto the ramp. His pants are almost falling down and he has to keep pulling them up again. He must weigh about 500 pounds but one thing is for sure...he's no athlete! AWR won't be offering him a contract anytime soon. Steal quickly realises he won't be able to get into the ring so meets him at the bottom of the ramp. The scene cuts back to David Saturn who has an incredulous look on his face.
Neal Steal-"First of all this guy is not in any way related to former NIWF superstar Skull! He's David Saturn's Father and right now you're going to tell everyone exactly what you think of your son!"
"Mr Saturn"-.....(gasps and spluttering sounds)
The man can hardly catch his breath! All he has done is walk down the ramp! We see a shot of his buttcrack showing before the camera thankfully cuts back to a VERY WIDE shot!
Neal Steal-"Take your time Mr Saturn..."
"Mr Saturn"-My son...my son...what's his name again?"
Neal Steal-"See he can't even remember your name David! Ha ha ha ha ha!"
The scene cuts to a crowd shot some of them are laughing...
"Mr Saturn"-My son...he's the reason...for this..."
Neal Steal-"The reason you're clinically obese? Like a lot of people in this country I suppose ha ha ha..."
"Mr Saturn"-"I'm on a diet...cough...cough...he did this to me..."
The obese man points at the ring announcer. Steal quickly grabs his hand and directs it towards David who still has a incredulous look on his face.
"Mr Saturn"-"He's a disgrace to the family name...cough...cough...my nephew is..."
Neal Steal-"He's your SON not your nephew! Get it right!"
"Mr Saturn"-"You paid me to..."
Steal quickly grabs the mic...
Neal Steal-"Yes I paid for your flight...erm...humphrey...now would you hurry up! Tell these fans what a lousy son David Saturn is! Let him know how it feels to have a family member come out here and humiliate him..."
The scene cuts back to Saturn who now has a grin on his face...looks like he's trying not to laugh...
"Mr Saturn"-"He was nothing more than a delinquent! He used to hang around with all sorts of undesirable people...all sorts of lowlifes and drunks..."
Neal Steal-"Nothing has changed there then! You should see the drunk he sucks up to now!"
"Mr Saturn"-"There were drug dealers all over the block and he was the main one pushing them!"
Saturn is now openly laughing at ringside as are the crowd. Steal is also laughing but seems oblivious to the fact others are laughing as well...
"Mr Saturn"-The boy never gave a damn about his little old Dad!"
The crowd laugh loudly at that remark...
"Mr Saturn"-"He was nothing more than a criminal! He was arrested numerous times and he was destined for a life of criminality! His Mother left me and walked out on the kids as well. I couldnt cope so I started eating and...well you can see for yourselves what happened there..."
Steal is shaking his head with a "sympathetic" look on his face.
"Mr Saturn"-and...(belches)...EXCUSE ME!"
Steal looks like he's about to pass out. David is laughing hysterically at the announce table.
"Mr Saturn"-"Somehow the boy...erm David wasn't it?"
Neal Steal-"Yes you fool! He's sitting at the desk over there! Excessive eating is a proven cause of memory loss everyone..."
"Mr Saturn"-"The kids ended up being taken into care because I couldn't cope with them. I didn't see David for another 15 years when I needed life saving gastric bypass surgery. I contacted my kids and they all came to see me apart from David. His brothers and sisters told me that he had somehow become a journalist and was commentating on wrestling shows with some idiot..."
The crowd laugh hysterically...
Neal Steal-"He's only ever commentated regularly with me, Al Walters and one other guy...they must have meant Tim Atom!"
"Mr Saturn"-I've never watched wrestling before so i had no idea he was on television."
Neal Steal-"Surprisingly because I hear all you ever do is sit on the couch with a bag of nachos flipping through the channels! Ha ha ha ha ha"
"Mr Saturn"-I'm trying my best to slim down. I asked his brothers and sisters if he would pay for my gastric surgery costs. David refused he didn't care if his Dad lived or died! He is a very bad son indeed! I had to resort to kindness from total strangers and other family members to pay for my surgery..."
David is in fits of laughter at the announce table...
"Mr Saturn"-So everyone don't cheer for this man. Do what this guy here says and BOO him!"
Steal shakes hands with "Saturn's Father" and retakes his place at the announce table. Steal notices Saturn laughing and looks surprised...
Neal Steal-"What are you laughing at?"
David Saturn-"What do you think! Ha ha ha ha ha"
Neal Steal-"Your Father just came out here and exposed you for what you are! You should be ashamed of yourself! Refusing to pay for your Father's life saving operation..."
David Saturn-"Ha ha ha! I didn't think it was possible for you to make an even bigger jackass of yourself but you surpassed even your usual standards here tonight!"
Neal Steal-"You're just pretending to laugh to save face! You're actually devastated by your humiliation here! Your Father just humiliated you in front of the world..."
David Saturn-"That was not my father! You know it, I know it and this crowd here knows it! Good God you're an idiot! How much did you pay that guy he was the worst actor I've ever seen! Ha ha ha!"
The scene cuts to a shot of the titantron as Saturn and the crowd laugh at a furious Steal...looks like RCH3 is on his way out!
David Saturn-"Well despite suffering such awful humiliation moments ago I think I'll be able to cope with calling this match Steal..."
Neal Steal-"You have no sense of shame...look at this idiot brandishing that dangerous weapon about..."
David Saturn-"Well he does not need a license for it incase you try that little stunt again..."
Neal Steal-"Well he should! Here comes Dustin Weaver from a country where dangerous weapons and violence are not glorified!"
From Toronto, Ontario, Canada...Dustin...WEAVER!!!
David Saturn-"Here comes Dustin Weaver with his manager Emily...no idea what her second name is..."
Neal Steal-"Its none of your business..."
David Saturn-"Well I really couldn't give a damn what here surname is. I think she will be a bit more wary about interfering this week with someone like RCH as her man's opponent..."
Neal Steal-"I doubt RCH has ever had a woman in his life..."
David Saturn-"What was it your REAL Mother said again Steal? Something about being suspended from school for looking in girls bathrooms wasn't it?
As Dustin goes to enter the ring RCH makes a grab for him causing Dustin to jump back off the apron. Dustin is slowly back onto the apron but is intimidated as RCH goes for him again! Weaver tries to climb in underneath the bottom rope but escapes again as RCH dives forward. Dustin once again tries but frustrates RCH by dropping to the outside quickly conversing with manager Emily...
Neal Steal-"Look how supportive she is of Dustin..."
David Saturn-"Wonder how supportive she will be when he loses again..."
Neal Steal-"Dustin has been overlooked in the last couple of weeks quietly picking up a couple of impressive wins..."
David Saturn-"Maybe he has been a little under the radar. Does not help when our esteemed champion rudely comes to the ring during his matches..."
Finally RCH has enough of the stalling tactics by Weaver and goes to the outside. RCH is taunting the crowd but Weaver spins him round and nails him with a right hand! Big left hand by RCH but Weaver reverses a whip into the ringpost! RCH falls to the ground clutching his head and Dustin talks some trash getting right in his face here...
Neal Steal-"That's what you need to do Dustin get right in the face of this idiot!"
David Saturn-"RCH unhappy with quite possibly the biggest trash talker in AWR...Rattlesnake. The ref failed to spot that chair shot Snake gave RCH last week...
Neal Steal-"He should take the loss like a man not go around making excuses like blaming the official..."
David Saturn-"He had every right to complain about it that should have been a DQ..."
Choke by Weaver and then a shot to the head. Dustin with a rake to the eyes and then he rolls Weaver into the ring. Stomp by Weaver and then he chokes him with his boot in the corner. RCH tries to get to his feet and Weaver blatantly rakes the eyes again. The referee admonishes RCH who whips Dustin off the ropes, Weaver ducks a clothesline, RCH charges again and Weaver hits a high dropkick!
Neal Steal-"Weaver couldn't even bring himself to address this oaf! It is beneath a pure athlete like Dustin having to face a clown like RCH..."
David Saturn-"He is not a clown and RCH kicked his ass in the past...well I can't remember exactly when but I trust what RCH says..."
Neal Steal-"How can you trust a guy who looks like RCH?"
Great elevation by Weaver and he goes to whip RCH into the corner. RCH reverses the whip, Dustin charges out and RCH connects with an elbow to the face! Weaver clutches his jaw and RCH pounds him with a flurry of right hands! The referee forces RCH to break and Dustin rolls to the outside. The ref admonishes RCH for using closed fists there...
Neal Steal-"Come on ref that's closed fists there...disqualify him..."
David Saturn-"Oh shut up! You were moaning about officials being blamed a few moments ago..."
Neal Steal-"The referee clearly saw that unlike the chair shot last week..."
David Saturn-"Right and how about you name the last referee who disqualified someone for a closed fist? Oh that's right you can't remember any can you?"
Neal Steal-"I don't even know this referees name..."
David Saturn-"Why don't you just make one up then like that ridiculous name my so called Father had..."
Weaver slowly gets back into the ring but drops back down again. Dustin going back to his frustrating stalling tactics and he jaws with the crowd as they abuse him. Suddenly RCH lays down on the mat...? Weaver charges in and stomps on RCH...that was a very unconventional way of getting an opponent back into the ring. Shot to the jaw by Dustin...
Neal Steal-"What an idiot! RCH just made himself bait there...that's like dropping into a sea full of sharks without a cage..."
David Saturn-"Unusual certainly but its sure as hell working right now! RCH pounding away on Weaver here!"
RCH fights back with shots to the ribs then whips Dustin into the corner. Weaver again makes the mistake of charging out too fast and RCH connects with a clothesline! The crowd are fully behind RCH who then goes for the cover...1,2...and Weaver kicks out. RCH whips Weaver off the ropes but is too obvious as he goes for a back body drop and Dustin kicks him on the chin...
David Saturn-"Another tremendous wrestling match...mainly inside the ring too aside from all that stalling..."
Neal Steal-"Well you're not getting your preferred blood and violence so far are you? You're going to see some pure wrestling later as well from Mr Royal..."
David Saturn-"Not planning on giving him another helping hand again are you?"
Nice clothesline by Dustin and the cover...1,2...and RCH kicks out. Jawbreaker by Dustin as he pulls RCH to his feet...that might knock out a few teeth! Kick to the ribs by Weaver who whips RCH off the ropes and delivers another clothesline. This is followed up by a big legdrop! 1,2...and RCH kicks out. Weaver's manager Emily angrily pounds her fist against the mat accusing the ref of a slow count...
Neal Steal-"These fans should be appreciating Weaver here. Booing him its nothing short of racism..."
David Saturn-"They are booing him because he's an arrogant jackass. Say what you like about RCH being a little unusual but he does not walk around with his nose in the air..."
Neal Steal-"Come on Dustin! Do some of those nice high flying flips...the types RCH won't like ha ha ha ha ha!"
David Saturn-"Oh you're such a riot..."
Dustin pulls RCH back to his feet and backs him into the corner. Chops to the chest by Dustin and then he goes to whip RCH into the ropes. Whip is reversed by RCH, Weaver charges back and RCH delivers a dropkick to the face! RCH then lifts Dustin into the air...vertical suplex! RCH with the cover, hooks the leg...1,2...and Weaver gets his shoulder up!
Neal Steal-"That count was a little fast...Dustin did very well to kick out..."
David Saturn-"Not a damn thing wrong with it...eyerake there bet you would be calling for a DQ if RCH did that Steal..."
Neal Steal-"He only did that because RCH used close fists! Rake his eyes Dustin rub that facepaint right into them!"
Dustin quickly rakes the eyes of RCH who responds with a punch to the ribs. Shot by RCH, Weaver responds with a blow of his own and both men are firing away on each other! Both men connect with right hands simultaneously and fall to the mat! The ref starts the count but both men are quick to their feet...double clothesline!
David Saturn-"This one could go either way...too close to call..."
Neal Steal-"I'm predicting Dustin will get the job done..."
David Saturn-"Surprise, surprise..."
First double right hands and now a double clothesline! Both men are down on the mat again and RCH is quicker to his feet. RCH plays to the crowd who responds with cheer and decks Weaver with a big right hand...another right hand and a whip into the corner. RCH charges in but Weaver connects with a kick to the ribs...
David Saturn-"Weaver up to the top...high risk move coming up here perhaps?"
Neal Steal-"Weaver flying through the air...yahoo...oh no!"
RCH is doubled over and Weaver quickly leaps to the top rope. Great athleticism and Dustin dives off with a flying crossbody. At the last moment however RCH rolls through and rolls up Weaver! 1,2...and Weaver just kicks out that was as close a call as you can get. RCH immediately climbs to the top rope and comes off connecting with a leg drop across the neck as Weaver rises!
David Saturn-"My God! That coul break Weaver's neck...that's 235 pounds crashing down on Weaver's neck there..."
Neal Steal-"I notice you have to point out it was Weaver's neck twice there. See you know these fans are idiots and need simple things like that pointed out to them..."
David Saturn-"Well they knew what that was and they damn sure know what this is! RCH has it locked in...Weaver gives up!"
RCH then applies the HATCHET DEATH LOCK!!! Emily enters the ring but is too late to break up the submission as Weaver quickly taps. RCH releases the hold as Dustin crawls into the corner. Emily meanwhile yells at RCH and slaps him! Emily then tends to Dustin in the corner. However she naively takes her eyes off RCH who comes up from behind delivering theWICKED WILD!!!
WINNER BY SUBMISSION: RCH3
Neal Steal-"That's disgusting! What a low move to attack an innocent woman!"
David Saturn-"Well she slapped RCH in the face what did she expect?"
Neal Steal-"So you condone that Saturn? Here pretty face might be ruined after that. RCH is just jealous of good looks that's why he wears all that paint..."
David Saturn-"I wouldn't say I condone it its not like RCH claims to be a great role model though is it? Emily was naive not to expect a reaction like that...you can't slap a guy like RCH and not expect him to respond..."
RCH raises his hatchet as officials and medics check on Emily who looks to be unconscious. Despite the fact RCH just attacked a woman (albeit after she hit him first) the crowd erupt with cheers anyway! Weaver yells at RCH from inside the ring seeming more concerned with that than checking on Emily's condition...
Neal Steal-"Get those cameras away...stop exploiting this poor Emily may be seriously injured..."
David Saturn-"Well we definitely are due a commercial break...we will be back in a few moments..."
Neal Steal-"RCH should be ashamed of himself!"
LIVE!
COMMENTATORS
AND
David Saturn-"Hello everyone and welcome to CRASH Tv! Tonight the grudge between Slick Doctor and Hell intensifies when they go one on one!"
Neal Steal-"Also tonight the AWR World Champion Mr Anthony Royal has been unjustifiably forced to place his championship on the line."
David Saturn-"RCH3 takes on Dustin Weaver while we will also see the number 1 contender Fa Sho in action! As a matter of fact he's coming up right now!"
Neal Steal-"Don't forget I promised a surprise for you here tonight Saturn!"
David Saturn-(Sarcastically)"I can hardly wait..."
VS
From St Louis, Missouri...Kris...Fa Shooooooooooooooo...DESTINY!!!
Neal Steal-"That ring announcer is so biased. I'm amazed he isn't wearing some of that tacky Fa Sho merchandise we are seeing here tonight..."
David Saturn-"Well perhaps he is a Fa Sho fan and you know what? So am I...good to see Sho looks well after that disgraceful beatdown he took last week..."
Neal Steal-"Sho was making rude gestures to Mr Royal all night so he got what he deserved...
From Los Angeles, California...Killa...Jay...COMBS!!!
David Saturn-"Here comes Jay Combs these are 2 men who know each other very well..."
Neal Steal-"Fa Sho was literally dripping with contempt for Combs earlier this week. Completely disrespectful towards a former world champion like Combs...
David Saturn-"They have been exchanging barbs for a few weeks since Combs arrived here. No real surprise this match didn't take long to be booked..."
As Sho enters the ring Combs immediately attacks pounding away on Destiny. Obviously Combs is angry with the comments Sho made earlier this week barely giving Sho time to remove his ring jacket. Combs takes the jacket and chokes Sho with it neck backed against the top rope. The ref breaks it up and Combs nails Sho with 2 big left hands. Combs whips Sho off the ropes...
Neal Sreal-"Combs has started on fire here! Sho is going to regret those comments...
David Saturn-"Why has he paid off a bunch of thugs to beat down his enemies as well?"
Neal Steal-"Combs is dominating...oh look at that cheap shot kick to the face..."
David Saturn-"Not a thing wrong with it Steal..."
Sho ducks a clothesline, rebounds and connects with a kick to the face. Combs with a left hand (not his preferred hand the right is still bandaged) but Sho executes a takedown! Sho is going for an armbar trying to apply pressure perhaps to the damaged right hand. Sho grasps at the bandage trying to remove it but Combs grabs the ropes. The ref forces Sho to break the hold...
David Saturn-"Sho openly saying he hopes Royal actually wins later tonight. Sho wants to get his hands on Royal more than anyone...
Neal Steal-"That shows how arrogant he is. He should be hoping Randal wins...not that it will happen of course...look at these fans booing Combs he is wrestling injured..."
David Saturn-"Combs has not said a word to AWR cameras for a couple of weeks now. Not sure what condition the hand is in. Sho perhaps should be targeting it more but perhaps he is trying to beat Combs without going for the easy option of targeting that hand..."
Combs quickly drops to the outside gaining some boos from the crowd. Sho follows and Combs immediately goes back into the ring. As Sho enters Combs charges, Sho drops down, Combs leaps over, rebounds and Sho raises his foot catching Combs in the ribs. Big superkick to the face by Sho and then pounds on Combs in the corner. Combs is whipped into the opposite corner...
Neal Steal-"Ha ha ha! Watch where you're going! Ha ha ha!"
David Saturn-"I don't think Sho unlike Royal is as cocky as he sounded this past week. He knows deep down he is facing a very tough, experienced opponent in Jay Combs..."
Neal Steal-"Combs really needs to get off the mark with a win...he should be number 1 contender if he wins as well..."
David Saturn-"That won't be the case. Sho is locked in for that title shot next week...signed and sealed no matter who the champion is..."
Neal Steal-"Mr Royal of course...who else?"
David Saturn-"The guy he's defending the title against tonight perhaps? Red Randal..."
Sho charges too quickly and Combs swings out his leg catching Sho in the face with his boot. Blows to the chest by Combs, whip off the ropes and Sho slips behind Combs leaping on his back. Sho is looking for a crucifix type pin here and gets Combs shoulders down...1,2...and Combs kicks out! Nice move there by Sho who is knocked down with a clothesline as both men get to their feet...
David Saturn-"Sho is such an all rounder. Is there really two better pure wrestlers in the AWR than Sho and Royal right now..."
Neal Steal-"About time you gave Mr Royal the credit he deserves..."
David Saturn-"I've always said he has the attributes which is why he shouldn't have to cheat! Oh by the way how is Silvio going to feel about you still backing Royal?"
Combs throws Sho through the middle rope and to the outside. Combs is catching a quick breather and Sho heads back into the ring. Kicks to the back by Combs and then he applies a rear chinlock. Combs is applying a lot of pressure here but Sho manages to rise to his feet. Club to the head by Combs, whips Sho off the ropes, Sho ducks a martial arts kick and delivers a flying crossbody on the rebound!
Neal Steal-"Kick out Combs! Yahoo! See Sho he's no pushover!"
David Saturn-"This is an excellent wrestling match. Most of the action inside the ring..."
Neal Steal-"Vampires like you won't like that...look at these bloodthirsty violent fans..."
David Saturn-"I said it was an excellent wrestling match you fool! Yes I like brawls but I damn sure have an appreciation for good wrestling! At least I know what most of the moves are called!"
1,2...and Combs kicks out! Combs is up very fast and knocks down Sho with a right hand. Another rear chinlock applied by Combs in the very centre of the ring. Sho again fights to his feet but is knocked back down with a kick to the ribs. Combs takes Sho by the arm, pulls him to his feet and knocks him back down again with a kick to the back. Combs then pulls Sho back up again...
Neal Steal-"Kick to the ribs there by Combs...called that right didn't I?"
David Saturn-"WOW! We are getting one hell of an anatomy lesson from Steal here tonight folks! Of course the anatomy part he's most familiar with would be the ass..."
Neal Steal-"Shut up Saturn..."
Another kick to the ribs from Combs and then he punches Sho in the face. Spinning heel kick by Combs,,,1,2...and Sho places his foot on the ropes. Combs argues with the ref for no apparent reason then whips Sho off the ropes. Combs goes for a back body drop but Sho slides down the back looking for a sunset flip! Combs counters with a blow right to the face...
David Saturn-"Combs with a very effective counter there...nothing fancy about that one!"
Neal Steal-"Hope he punches Sho in the throat next maybe that might shut him up with his arrogant comments..."
David Saturn-"Shame nobody has punched you in the throat..."
Neal Steal-"Why don't you take a shot then?"
David Saturn-"I'm not going to get myself fired...believe me I have learnt self restraint sitting out here with a moron like you!"
Neal Steal-"Bet you attack me later when you see what my surprise is..."
Combs rebounds off the ropes and goes for an elbowdrop but Sho protects himself by raising his knees. Combs clutches his elbow and chest and both men are on their feet. Right hands by Sho, whip off the ropes and drives Combs into the mat with a spinebuster! Cover...1,2...and Combs just kicks out. Right hand by Sho, whip off the ropes...hurricanrana! Combs is up again...Sho hooks underneath the arm...sambo suplex!
David Saturn-"Sho with a great technical move there...and now he has the submission locked in!"
Neal Steal-"Grab the ropes! Quick! Damn it!"
David Saturn-"We have our winner...Fa Sho!"
Sho quickly applies the LOCKDOWN to Combs! There's nowhere for Sho to go and after a few moments he taps out! Sho with another submission victory here on CRASH Tv!
WINNER BY SUBMISSION: FA SHO
Neal Steal-"I hope he does not believe he is going to make Mr Royal submit with that move. That is the second time he has used it..."
David Saturn-"He may well be using it to send a message to Royal..."
Neal Steal-"Mr Royal has never submitted in his life..."
David Saturn-"Except when he did against Slick when you saved his ass..."
Neal Steal-"He was trying to get the referees attention while he was down. That's all I was trying to do before you brutally attacked me. You're going to pay for that in a few minutes..."
David Saturn-"Right. Well we will be right back in just a few moments! Stay tuned!"
**************************************************************************************************************************
We return from commercial to a chorus of boos as Steal is standing in the centre of the ring with a mic.
Neal Steal-"Last week my poor Mother was the victim of serious exploitation! Now I know Slick was the one who paid for her flight! However I am not in the slightest doubt that it was your idea Saturn! You were just too much of a cheapskate to pay for the plane so you had to get your best buddy to do it for you!
The scene cuts to a shot of Saturn rolling his eyes.
Neal Steal-"Since Saturn wants to mess with my family I've decided to give him a taste of his own medicine! I said on twitter I would have a LARGE surprise for you ha ha ha ha ha! Without further ado I introduce to you none other than YOUR FATHER! Humphrey Saturn!!!"
A gigantic man waddles out onto the ramp. His pants are almost falling down and he has to keep pulling them up again. He must weigh about 500 pounds but one thing is for sure...he's no athlete! AWR won't be offering him a contract anytime soon. Steal quickly realises he won't be able to get into the ring so meets him at the bottom of the ramp. The scene cuts back to David Saturn who has an incredulous look on his face.
Neal Steal-"First of all this guy is not in any way related to former NIWF superstar Skull! He's David Saturn's Father and right now you're going to tell everyone exactly what you think of your son!"
"Mr Saturn"-.....(gasps and spluttering sounds)
The man can hardly catch his breath! All he has done is walk down the ramp! We see a shot of his buttcrack showing before the camera thankfully cuts back to a VERY WIDE shot!
Neal Steal-"Take your time Mr Saturn..."
"Mr Saturn"-My son...my son...what's his name again?"
Neal Steal-"See he can't even remember your name David! Ha ha ha ha ha!"
The scene cuts to a crowd shot some of them are laughing...
"Mr Saturn"-My son...he's the reason...for this..."
Neal Steal-"The reason you're clinically obese? Like a lot of people in this country I suppose ha ha ha..."
"Mr Saturn"-"I'm on a diet...cough...cough...he did this to me..."
The obese man points at the ring announcer. Steal quickly grabs his hand and directs it towards David who still has a incredulous look on his face.
"Mr Saturn"-"He's a disgrace to the family name...cough...cough...my nephew is..."
Neal Steal-"He's your SON not your nephew! Get it right!"
"Mr Saturn"-"You paid me to..."
Steal quickly grabs the mic...
Neal Steal-"Yes I paid for your flight...erm...humphrey...now would you hurry up! Tell these fans what a lousy son David Saturn is! Let him know how it feels to have a family member come out here and humiliate him..."
The scene cuts back to Saturn who now has a grin on his face...looks like he's trying not to laugh...
"Mr Saturn"-"He was nothing more than a delinquent! He used to hang around with all sorts of undesirable people...all sorts of lowlifes and drunks..."
Neal Steal-"Nothing has changed there then! You should see the drunk he sucks up to now!"
"Mr Saturn"-"There were drug dealers all over the block and he was the main one pushing them!"
Saturn is now openly laughing at ringside as are the crowd. Steal is also laughing but seems oblivious to the fact others are laughing as well...
"Mr Saturn"-The boy never gave a damn about his little old Dad!"
The crowd laugh loudly at that remark...
"Mr Saturn"-"He was nothing more than a criminal! He was arrested numerous times and he was destined for a life of criminality! His Mother left me and walked out on the kids as well. I couldnt cope so I started eating and...well you can see for yourselves what happened there..."
Steal is shaking his head with a "sympathetic" look on his face.
"Mr Saturn"-and...(belches)...EXCUSE ME!"
Steal looks like he's about to pass out. David is laughing hysterically at the announce table.
"Mr Saturn"-"Somehow the boy...erm David wasn't it?"
Neal Steal-"Yes you fool! He's sitting at the desk over there! Excessive eating is a proven cause of memory loss everyone..."
"Mr Saturn"-"The kids ended up being taken into care because I couldn't cope with them. I didn't see David for another 15 years when I needed life saving gastric bypass surgery. I contacted my kids and they all came to see me apart from David. His brothers and sisters told me that he had somehow become a journalist and was commentating on wrestling shows with some idiot..."
The crowd laugh hysterically...
Neal Steal-"He's only ever commentated regularly with me, Al Walters and one other guy...they must have meant Tim Atom!"
"Mr Saturn"-I've never watched wrestling before so i had no idea he was on television."
Neal Steal-"Surprisingly because I hear all you ever do is sit on the couch with a bag of nachos flipping through the channels! Ha ha ha ha ha"
"Mr Saturn"-I'm trying my best to slim down. I asked his brothers and sisters if he would pay for my gastric surgery costs. David refused he didn't care if his Dad lived or died! He is a very bad son indeed! I had to resort to kindness from total strangers and other family members to pay for my surgery..."
David is in fits of laughter at the announce table...
"Mr Saturn"-So everyone don't cheer for this man. Do what this guy here says and BOO him!"
Steal shakes hands with "Saturn's Father" and retakes his place at the announce table. Steal notices Saturn laughing and looks surprised...
Neal Steal-"What are you laughing at?"
David Saturn-"What do you think! Ha ha ha ha ha"
Neal Steal-"Your Father just came out here and exposed you for what you are! You should be ashamed of yourself! Refusing to pay for your Father's life saving operation..."
David Saturn-"Ha ha ha! I didn't think it was possible for you to make an even bigger jackass of yourself but you surpassed even your usual standards here tonight!"
Neal Steal-"You're just pretending to laugh to save face! You're actually devastated by your humiliation here! Your Father just humiliated you in front of the world..."
David Saturn-"That was not my father! You know it, I know it and this crowd here knows it! Good God you're an idiot! How much did you pay that guy he was the worst actor I've ever seen! Ha ha ha!"
The scene cuts to a shot of the titantron as Saturn and the crowd laugh at a furious Steal...looks like RCH3 is on his way out!
VS
From the Dark Forest....RCH...3333333333!!!
David Saturn-"Well despite suffering such awful humiliation moments ago I think I'll be able to cope with calling this match Steal..."
Neal Steal-"You have no sense of shame...look at this idiot brandishing that dangerous weapon about..."
David Saturn-"Well he does not need a license for it incase you try that little stunt again..."
Neal Steal-"Well he should! Here comes Dustin Weaver from a country where dangerous weapons and violence are not glorified!"
From Toronto, Ontario, Canada...Dustin...WEAVER!!!
David Saturn-"Here comes Dustin Weaver with his manager Emily...no idea what her second name is..."
Neal Steal-"Its none of your business..."
David Saturn-"Well I really couldn't give a damn what here surname is. I think she will be a bit more wary about interfering this week with someone like RCH as her man's opponent..."
Neal Steal-"I doubt RCH has ever had a woman in his life..."
David Saturn-"What was it your REAL Mother said again Steal? Something about being suspended from school for looking in girls bathrooms wasn't it?
As Dustin goes to enter the ring RCH makes a grab for him causing Dustin to jump back off the apron. Dustin is slowly back onto the apron but is intimidated as RCH goes for him again! Weaver tries to climb in underneath the bottom rope but escapes again as RCH dives forward. Dustin once again tries but frustrates RCH by dropping to the outside quickly conversing with manager Emily...
Neal Steal-"Look how supportive she is of Dustin..."
David Saturn-"Wonder how supportive she will be when he loses again..."
Neal Steal-"Dustin has been overlooked in the last couple of weeks quietly picking up a couple of impressive wins..."
David Saturn-"Maybe he has been a little under the radar. Does not help when our esteemed champion rudely comes to the ring during his matches..."
Finally RCH has enough of the stalling tactics by Weaver and goes to the outside. RCH is taunting the crowd but Weaver spins him round and nails him with a right hand! Big left hand by RCH but Weaver reverses a whip into the ringpost! RCH falls to the ground clutching his head and Dustin talks some trash getting right in his face here...
Neal Steal-"That's what you need to do Dustin get right in the face of this idiot!"
David Saturn-"RCH unhappy with quite possibly the biggest trash talker in AWR...Rattlesnake. The ref failed to spot that chair shot Snake gave RCH last week...
Neal Steal-"He should take the loss like a man not go around making excuses like blaming the official..."
David Saturn-"He had every right to complain about it that should have been a DQ..."
Choke by Weaver and then a shot to the head. Dustin with a rake to the eyes and then he rolls Weaver into the ring. Stomp by Weaver and then he chokes him with his boot in the corner. RCH tries to get to his feet and Weaver blatantly rakes the eyes again. The referee admonishes RCH who whips Dustin off the ropes, Weaver ducks a clothesline, RCH charges again and Weaver hits a high dropkick!
Neal Steal-"Weaver couldn't even bring himself to address this oaf! It is beneath a pure athlete like Dustin having to face a clown like RCH..."
David Saturn-"He is not a clown and RCH kicked his ass in the past...well I can't remember exactly when but I trust what RCH says..."
Neal Steal-"How can you trust a guy who looks like RCH?"
Great elevation by Weaver and he goes to whip RCH into the corner. RCH reverses the whip, Dustin charges out and RCH connects with an elbow to the face! Weaver clutches his jaw and RCH pounds him with a flurry of right hands! The referee forces RCH to break and Dustin rolls to the outside. The ref admonishes RCH for using closed fists there...
Neal Steal-"Come on ref that's closed fists there...disqualify him..."
David Saturn-"Oh shut up! You were moaning about officials being blamed a few moments ago..."
Neal Steal-"The referee clearly saw that unlike the chair shot last week..."
David Saturn-"Right and how about you name the last referee who disqualified someone for a closed fist? Oh that's right you can't remember any can you?"
Neal Steal-"I don't even know this referees name..."
David Saturn-"Why don't you just make one up then like that ridiculous name my so called Father had..."
Weaver slowly gets back into the ring but drops back down again. Dustin going back to his frustrating stalling tactics and he jaws with the crowd as they abuse him. Suddenly RCH lays down on the mat...? Weaver charges in and stomps on RCH...that was a very unconventional way of getting an opponent back into the ring. Shot to the jaw by Dustin...
Neal Steal-"What an idiot! RCH just made himself bait there...that's like dropping into a sea full of sharks without a cage..."
David Saturn-"Unusual certainly but its sure as hell working right now! RCH pounding away on Weaver here!"
RCH fights back with shots to the ribs then whips Dustin into the corner. Weaver again makes the mistake of charging out too fast and RCH connects with a clothesline! The crowd are fully behind RCH who then goes for the cover...1,2...and Weaver kicks out. RCH whips Weaver off the ropes but is too obvious as he goes for a back body drop and Dustin kicks him on the chin...
David Saturn-"Another tremendous wrestling match...mainly inside the ring too aside from all that stalling..."
Neal Steal-"Well you're not getting your preferred blood and violence so far are you? You're going to see some pure wrestling later as well from Mr Royal..."
David Saturn-"Not planning on giving him another helping hand again are you?"
Nice clothesline by Dustin and the cover...1,2...and RCH kicks out. Jawbreaker by Dustin as he pulls RCH to his feet...that might knock out a few teeth! Kick to the ribs by Weaver who whips RCH off the ropes and delivers another clothesline. This is followed up by a big legdrop! 1,2...and RCH kicks out. Weaver's manager Emily angrily pounds her fist against the mat accusing the ref of a slow count...
Neal Steal-"These fans should be appreciating Weaver here. Booing him its nothing short of racism..."
David Saturn-"They are booing him because he's an arrogant jackass. Say what you like about RCH being a little unusual but he does not walk around with his nose in the air..."
Neal Steal-"Come on Dustin! Do some of those nice high flying flips...the types RCH won't like ha ha ha ha ha!"
David Saturn-"Oh you're such a riot..."
Dustin pulls RCH back to his feet and backs him into the corner. Chops to the chest by Dustin and then he goes to whip RCH into the ropes. Whip is reversed by RCH, Weaver charges back and RCH delivers a dropkick to the face! RCH then lifts Dustin into the air...vertical suplex! RCH with the cover, hooks the leg...1,2...and Weaver gets his shoulder up!
Neal Steal-"That count was a little fast...Dustin did very well to kick out..."
David Saturn-"Not a damn thing wrong with it...eyerake there bet you would be calling for a DQ if RCH did that Steal..."
Neal Steal-"He only did that because RCH used close fists! Rake his eyes Dustin rub that facepaint right into them!"
Dustin quickly rakes the eyes of RCH who responds with a punch to the ribs. Shot by RCH, Weaver responds with a blow of his own and both men are firing away on each other! Both men connect with right hands simultaneously and fall to the mat! The ref starts the count but both men are quick to their feet...double clothesline!
David Saturn-"This one could go either way...too close to call..."
Neal Steal-"I'm predicting Dustin will get the job done..."
David Saturn-"Surprise, surprise..."
First double right hands and now a double clothesline! Both men are down on the mat again and RCH is quicker to his feet. RCH plays to the crowd who responds with cheer and decks Weaver with a big right hand...another right hand and a whip into the corner. RCH charges in but Weaver connects with a kick to the ribs...
David Saturn-"Weaver up to the top...high risk move coming up here perhaps?"
Neal Steal-"Weaver flying through the air...yahoo...oh no!"
RCH is doubled over and Weaver quickly leaps to the top rope. Great athleticism and Dustin dives off with a flying crossbody. At the last moment however RCH rolls through and rolls up Weaver! 1,2...and Weaver just kicks out that was as close a call as you can get. RCH immediately climbs to the top rope and comes off connecting with a leg drop across the neck as Weaver rises!
David Saturn-"My God! That coul break Weaver's neck...that's 235 pounds crashing down on Weaver's neck there..."
Neal Steal-"I notice you have to point out it was Weaver's neck twice there. See you know these fans are idiots and need simple things like that pointed out to them..."
David Saturn-"Well they knew what that was and they damn sure know what this is! RCH has it locked in...Weaver gives up!"
RCH then applies the HATCHET DEATH LOCK!!! Emily enters the ring but is too late to break up the submission as Weaver quickly taps. RCH releases the hold as Dustin crawls into the corner. Emily meanwhile yells at RCH and slaps him! Emily then tends to Dustin in the corner. However she naively takes her eyes off RCH who comes up from behind delivering theWICKED WILD!!!
WINNER BY SUBMISSION: RCH3
Neal Steal-"That's disgusting! What a low move to attack an innocent woman!"
David Saturn-"Well she slapped RCH in the face what did she expect?"
Neal Steal-"So you condone that Saturn? Here pretty face might be ruined after that. RCH is just jealous of good looks that's why he wears all that paint..."
David Saturn-"I wouldn't say I condone it its not like RCH claims to be a great role model though is it? Emily was naive not to expect a reaction like that...you can't slap a guy like RCH and not expect him to respond..."
RCH raises his hatchet as officials and medics check on Emily who looks to be unconscious. Despite the fact RCH just attacked a woman (albeit after she hit him first) the crowd erupt with cheers anyway! Weaver yells at RCH from inside the ring seeming more concerned with that than checking on Emily's condition...
Neal Steal-"Get those cameras away...stop exploiting this poor Emily may be seriously injured..."
David Saturn-"Well we definitely are due a commercial break...we will be back in a few moments..."
Neal Steal-"RCH should be ashamed of himself!"